


Downbeat

by corporalhandsome



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Orchestra, Angst with a Happy Ending, Conductor Erwin Smith (Shingeki no Kyojin), Drama, Levi's super confident lol, M/M, Multi, Romance, Violinist Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-06
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2019-07-27 05:26:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 26,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16212356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/corporalhandsome/pseuds/corporalhandsome
Summary: Violinist Levi Ackerman has a whole collection of the Sina Philharmonic records, from the first to the most recent under the direction of Conductor Erwin Smith. He worshiped the orchestra (but mostly Erwin) like a religion, but due to a low-paying job, assumed that he would never climb to that sort of fame. However, things change when he suddenly finds himself in the same aisle as the maestro at his workplace. Within days, his life turns around for the better, or for the worse. Will he be able to handle the drama musicians have been known to carry? Adventures of Levi becoming concertmaster, some people hating his guts, and Erwin's new discoveries.





	1. Accelerando (Accel.)

“No, come on.. They’ve got to have it.”

 

“Could I help you find something, sir? Perhaps a specific artist?”

 

This was a natural occurrence. This man, no older that about twenty five, ducks his head into the classical section of old records in attempt to find something that was just released. He sifts through each folder, double checking, triple checking, and then going up to the front desk in attempt to find it in the back of their new storage inventory. At this point, he was the main source of the store’s monthly income.

 

His grey eyes turned to the employee behind him, shyness overcoming him. “Yes, the newest release. I read in the paper that it was sent out to stores today.”

 

His appearance was sub-par. Nothing that made himself stand out. His silken black strands were always trimmed above the ear, parted neatly to the side, and the black of his head was shaved. His outfit was a cross between business casual and subway rider. Nevertheless, he always seemed to straddle the line of being presentable and comfortable. From what the cashier could infer, he must not have enough money to buy clothing to fit the venue his favorite genre performed in, hence why he bought records rather than going to see the real deal. What was always seen, however, was a large case on his back. The straps fit like a backpack, and the case itself was worn-down mahogany leather, the engraving of a rose etched into the front pocket. The value was not in the outside, but within.

 

“We just got it in a couple days ago. The record plating company is getting faster as years pass. This was what you wanted, right? Brahms, Violin Concerto in D major, Si-”

 

“Sina Philharmonic, Soloist Marlowe Freudenberg, Erwin Smith as Conductor. Yes, exactly.”

 

“That’ll be three dollars, Mister Ackerman.”

 

A troubled gaze flashed over the male’s eyes. Hesitantly, he reached into his pocket to take out his wallet, opening the pocket of dollar bills and anticipating what he was about to see.

_Come on.. I thought I had four quarters to cover the price…_

 

A soft exhale relief came from his thin lips when he found that he did, in fact, have two bills and four silver coins to pay for the brand new record. Relief shone over his face when he proudly pushed it across the counter in exchange for his new collection piece. With nimble fingers, he picked it up with the utmost care, looking down at the all-too familiar face.

 

A structured face, thick eyebrows furrowed up in expression, slightly plush lips just barely parted. His tailcoat was in mid-flight due to his exuberant emotions. If he could look hard enough, he saw the glimmer of those brilliant, mature, and professional blue irises. They could hold so much behind them in something as simple as a picture. Erwin Smith himself was those three. Hailed among many, he was the country’s and one of the world’s most esteemed orchestral conductors.

 

Levi knew he would never reach to such talents to ever meet him. Thus, he settled for scraping up a few bucks off his paycheck to pay for the recording of each performance to add on to his already voluminous collection of pieces he had back at home. It was an investment he took passionately, and he wasn’t planning on giving it up anytime soon, even if it meant he wouldn’t have enough to eat for the day.

 

“Sir, I need to bag it for you.”

 

“O-Oh. Right. My apologies.”

 

Levi Ackerman was a violinist. Beginning at the age of five by his ailing mother’s request, music was everything he’d ever known. Lessons were taught to him every day, and if not, then he was sat in front of a record player with the music and instructed to listen to each stroke, each bowing change, each shift. He learned by the sheet music, then by the ear, and then by the music. While his mother taught him technique and skill, he focused on musicality and tone. If listening to something made another person happy, he needed to convey the right emotions to garner that pleasure and enjoyment. The audience wasn’t going to watch someone that sounded like a robot. Erwin Smith must have worked very hard on this, because this was what the Sina Philharmonic was amazing at. They took technique and musicality, and combined both into one. They were truly breathtaking, both live and by recording. Levi still had yet to see them on stage with his very own eyes.

 

Levi’s home was nothing special. He was below the average income rate, worked a job that paid a little over $7 an hour, and on top of that, he was a musician. Making money in music was harder than other jobs. Most people did it for the enjoyment, mostly due to the fact that there were only so many people that could earn a spot in an orchestra as esteemed as the Philharmonic. His apartment was on the fifth floor of an apartment complex two blocks away from the St. Mitras Cathedral, and above a small convenience store. He rented it out for $500 a month. While it wasn’t the best, it had running water, a decent couch, and one outlet on the side of the wall. He didn’t need much to begin with, anyways. Stepping up the final flight of stairs with a huff of breath, Levi fumbled with his keys for a moment to unlock the door to his room, knees weak from the climb he made.

 

Within minutes, the record was gently turning, and the pick was positioned at the beginning of the piece. His case was laying perpendicular to his mattress, and Levi himself shed his shoes to sit on his bed. He was cross-legged, stapled sheets of paper in his left hand. It was the violin concerto itself, and in his right, he held a pencil. As the music went on, and if he wasn’t distracted by the dips and bows of emotions captivated in the orchestra alone, he would mark changes in the key signature, helpful shifts of the finger, and everything in between. He wanted to master the literature before the playing. Every piece was a story just waiting to be conveyed.

“Turn off that racket, Levi! There’s people here trying to sleep!”

 

“Enough, already!”

 

Two pounds at the door. That’s one less than a week ago. With his grey eyes looking down to his watch, he sighed. Well, he got about five minutes into the Allegro giocoso. Perhaps he could finish the rest of it tomorrow morning.

 

Levi worked two part time jobs. In the morning, he’d bake the daily bread sold at the bakery, and after his hour break, he would change out of his uniform, into another, and finished his afternoon at the main grocery store of the district. He shelved new inventory, clean the floors, push carts, and also work the cash register. That was rare, though. He enjoyed the therapeutic task of repetitive motions. It helped him straighten out his thoughts, some of them being light daydreams. What if someone from the philharmonic came in? Maybe Eren Jaeger, the principal second violinist, or Jean Kirschtein, the clarinetist, or maybe even Historia Reiss, the flautist? There were so many options, but even after seven years of working in this store every day, he’s failed to see anyone. Even if it was a nice thought, he’d laugh at the idea of ever catching a glance of the conductor. Maestro Smith probably went to the heart of the city to even get something as minimal as an apple.

 

Until turning the corner into the tea and coffee aisle, it was nothing more than a fairy tale.

 

Levi almost dropped the box of jasmine pomegranate he had in his hands. Standing there, trying to look for a certain tea brand, was the blonde celebrity himself. Erwin Smith, the music director of the Sina Philharmonic. He wasn’t even dressed in his usual formal attire. Surprisingly, he wore something a little more casual than expected: a dark green turtleneck that hugged his waist perfectly, a pair of dark blue denim jeans, and mahogany dress shoes. Perfect for the holidays, which was in about three weeks or so. He was about ten feet away from where Levi stood, or-.. what used to be Levi. He was certain his soul was already making its way to heaven, and his body was close to collapsing when such a captivating, azure gaze shifted to him. The lonely grocery store employee running on a few hours of sleep and yesterday’s breakfast. He didn’t even have a name tag on.

 

“Ah, perfect timing. Would you help me? I’m trying to find a specific brand.. I don’t know if your grocer carries it..” A chuckle escapes the taller male’s mouth. It sounded like honey, it was so smooth. “I don’t even remember half the name. It was.. Gold Kiling, I believe.”

 

“Gold Kili.” Levi’s voice came out with a small crack. He cleared his throat. Don’t fuck it up, come on. That brand, though expensive, was one of the best teas out there. Levi’s always wanted to try it, but due to the fact that he wasn’t Erwin Smith or the Concertmaster of the Sina Phil, he couldn’t afford even a bag of it. Gingerly, he set the box down, striding over to the shelf Erwin had been scanning, and held his breath as he moved down to pick up the box Erwin was looking for. He was merely inches away. Could the conductor hear his small heart pounding out of his chest? It was certainly loud. “It’s popular among the community, even more so than those cheap impersonator brands.” Who thought pairing green with a fruit was a good idea? “I recommend using a kettle on a stove for the water, covering it for five minutes to let it steep with the loose leaves, and then draining it into another cup. The ginger flavor will be very prominent, then.” Levi failed to see that as he was talking, he’d been looking down to the package, rather than up at the other’s eyes. Upon turning his gaze up, he found that those ocean blue eyes had never left his form. His legs locked out of the surprise.

 

“You certainly know a lot about tea.” was the first thing that came from Erwin’s lips. His voice was so dulcet, so deep, and there was a faint accent. Ah, that was right. He was from the other side of the country. Levi knew that from his biography. “I used to be a coffee drinker, but I had to give it up. It was giving me heartburn, hence my interest in this ginger tea.” He gestured to the bag with a gentler smile on his lips. “Is there any other brand you’d recommend? I feel like I can trust your judgement.”

 

This wasn’t real. Erwin was asking for his preferences? Levi swallowed thickly, looking down to the endless boxes with a new redness to his cheeks. He reached out for a common brand, it being a small box of bags for no more than fifty cents. He wasn’t shy; he was embarrassed. “This one is a good alternative for more expensive greens. I-.. I don’t buy it all the time, but it’s pretty good.”

 

“Great. A green and a ginger tea. My collection will start with two good brands. Thank you, uh..” Erwin looked to Levi’s chest, trying to find a tag, but redirecting his gaze back to his face when he didn’t find any. He was silently waiting for an answer. Levi didn’t catch on until a few moments later.

 

“Levi.”

 

“Levi.” Erwin repeated for himself. The name rolled off his tongue so easily, it caused the petite raven to internally shiver. It was so awkward, to hear a man he had worshipped so immensely to speak his name to fluidly. Now, his cheeks burned.

 

“Well, Levi, thank you for the tea suggestions. I hope to enjoy these.”

 

Wait. No. Was he going to leave? Erwin’s heel pivoted in the opposite direction, causing Levi to inhale sharply. A fire kindle in his stomach. If this was the only chance life was going to give him at seeing a man he looked up to so highly, he wasn’t going to let his chances slide. His hands curled into fists.

 

What was he going to lose? His reputation? He didn’t have one.

 

“I don’t think you should have let Marlowe play that cadenza.”

 

Erwin froze, immediately turning back around. He was obviously confused, but curious. That smile he had on before fell when one of his thick brows arched. “Pardon?”

 

Levi’s stomach pooled with regret. He took a deep breath, shoving his hands into his pockets to conceal the fact that his fingers were trembling. “The Joachim rendition is famous for the double stops. He could do them, but the piano parts sounded like they were forte all the way through. It didn’t sound like a piece at all.” What was he saying?! Why was he getting so confident?

 

“Oh, I know. I talked with him for hours about it, but he wasn’t listening.”

 

...What?

 

“It’s disproportionate on the recording. It sounds like an etude.” Levi continued courageously.

 

“You happen to be the second person that’s told him that.”

 

“Who was the-”

 

“I did initially. I didn’t think the record would sell.”

 

Levi’s face was already flushed. He took a very deep breath to try and calm himself down. Erwin noticed this, his serious expression loosening back up into a more talkative one. “Say, Levi, have you listened to the entire recording? I’m assuming you bought it, if you knew about his cadenza.”

 

“Yes-.. Er-.. no. I still have about five minutes to listen to.”

 

“Don’t bother. The entire recording shouldn’t even be out.” His face contorted with gentle distaste. “I adore that piece, but Marlowe needs to work on his phrasing. It’s minute, minimal, and he still has a lot to learn.”

 

Levi was in shock. Marlowe was, in fact, the concertmaster, and here the conductor was, speaking his truth even if he didn’t know the other male past his name and tea preferences. He could be a magazine editor, for all he knew. When their eyes connected once again, he peered down, his stomach tightening at the intenseness of his gaze.

 

“Do you play?”

 

Of course. Levi nodded. “Violin.”

 

“How long?”

 

“More than a decade, probably more than fifteen years. I’ve lost count.”

“Are you available anytime this evening?”

 

“I-..” Levi thought about it, trying to determine when he would be available. He was going to continue practicing that Concerto tonight, but he could skip a day if it meant bending to the maestro’s will, right..? “..Yes.”

 

“Come to the Cathedral this evening. Bring the cadenza.”

 

Levi was grateful he didn’t eat lunch yet, otherwise he would have definitely thrown up. His thin brows furrowed. Erwin waited for him to speak. Rather than making an excuse about how he hadn’t practiced it as much as he’d liked, he looked down to his outfit.

 

“I don’t have anything too presentable.”

 

“Clothes aren’t going to affect your performance, Levi.” Erwin’s tone suddenly softened. His brows seemed to relax. “I want to hear you play, and I don’t mind what you come dressed in. As long as you have a bow and instrument, I’m content.” He checked the time, lips parting with surprise. He looked back up, setting that smile back on his face. “I need to get going. It was nice meeting you, Levi. I look forwards to hearing you play.”

 

And with that, he was gone. He paid for his teas and left. Levi was still in the aisle, but as soon as he could regain his senses, everything came back to him. His breathing turned shallow, and both hands ran through his black hair. Did he just do that? Who the hell did he think he was?! Some hotshot bigger than Erwin? He was going to go down there and make an absolute fool of himself!

 

“..Uh, Levi?” The female voice of his coworker came from his right. He looked up, obviously looking a little sickly. She looked at him with immense concern. “..You don’t look so good. Do you want to take the rest of the day off? I can cover your shift.”

 

“No. I’m fine, I’m just-..” Levi immediately went to work on his shelving task. “I’m planning my funeral tomorrow. Should I go with an ebony or rosewood casket?”


	2. Affrettando

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi finds himself in the middle of Erwin's secret plan; throwing him in the pond and expecting him to learn how to swim. Can he handle the pressure? He also meets Armin and Erwin who are the first two of many friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I highly recommend checking out the Brahms Violin Concerto (specifically the cadenza and first movement only) before reading. Not required, though. Enjoy the next part of this story!

To think his life would be changed by working at Mitras Supermarket. He wouldn’t believe it if something told him a job he thought of merely as a way to get his record-buying money would suddenly be the place he saw one of his biggest idols and the country’s biggest conductors. Remembering the conversation he had with Erwin Smith alone made his stomach tighten and his knees weak. In fact, he needed to sit down upon lacing his shoes when he remembered that focused, light blue gaze. Erwin was not only a man of pristine, but his music spoke better than any other record he’d picked up before. There’s a reason why he held such an impressive position at the Philharmonic.

 

And he spoke to Levi as if they were acquaintances. They agreed on the concertmaster’s mediocre performance. The conductor himself said it wasn’t his best recording, and he couldn't have said it better himself. Levi was a lowlife. How could he have been noticed by such a higher soul? Well, now wasn’t the time to question it. He needed to get going if he was going to walk down to the Cathedral by nightfall.

 

It was about six in the evening right now, the sunset just now starting to descend behind the mountains in the distance. Levi changed out of his grocery uniform, showered, and made himself look as professional and formal as he could. He wore a black button-down shirt that was tucked into dark blue slacks that cut off at the ankle. His ankles were covered by black knee-high socks and tied into the cleanest pair of shoes he owned, which were an unfortunate pair of completely black sneakers. Not the best, but close enough to fit this venue. He couldn’t afford anything more than this at the moment. Finally shrugging on a brown cardigan that fit snugly against his waist and shoulders, he checked over his appearance in the mirror, picked up his violin, and left his apartment room. Nervousness brewed with hunger in his system. He really didn’t know what was going to happen as soon as he stepped foot in that room.

 

The district of Mitras was busy today. The landlocked city surrounded by green fields was filled with diverse groups of tourists, side-eyeing locals, and an overall good morale for what was the rest of the day. The night was clear, though one wouldn’t be able to see the stars unless out on the countryside, for there were too many lights around for it to be very noticeable. Levi walked through the pedestrian streets carefully, both straps of his violin case around his arms. He kept his gaze down, especially when he went right towards the Cathedral. Worst case scenario, he would get yelled at. Best case scenario… well, he ends up in the Sina Philharmonic, but again, that was an even farther from reality. Erwin would never give him a job. He was probably just giving him complimentary tickets to the next concert, or something.

 

Or, you know, chose to invite him to a rehearsal.

 

Pushing the doors open to the lobby, and then going through to the main concert hall, Levi was sure he was either going to pass out from shock or wake up from a nap he was taking in the lounge room of the grocery store. All symphony members were on stage, including Erwin himself, and from what he could hear, they must have been practicing for the next concert. It would be next Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. The biggest pieces on the repertoire were Mozart’s Symphony 40 in G minor, and Mahler’s 4th Symphony. What a pairing, to go from something so smooth and old-fashioned to such a long and demanding piece. Was Erwin really serious about something like that?

 

He wasn’t going to open his mouth about it again. Not now, not ever. Maybe in secret, when he knew no one was watching.

 

His thoughts were broken when he heard the music fade, Erwin turning to look to Levi with a smile. “Ah! Our special guest is here.” His voice was much louder than before, but that was mainly to project across a space of ninety people. Speaking of which, just about every pair of eyes belonging to said individuals were now looking at him, some with confusion, some with pleasant surprise, and others… with pure disgust. One of those was Marlowe Freudenberg, the concermaster. His aura was deathly and predatory. Erwin’s gaze, however, seemed to humble and welcoming. “Go backstage and get your instrument out, we’ll take a moment to adjust the stage for you.”

 

..What?

 

Levi swallowed, making sure his voice was clear before speaking. “Alright.” he said, walking down to the ground level of the hall, stepping up to the platoorm, and very quietly sliding backstage. From what it looked like, he was the only person that was oblivious to what was going on. Those musicians, they seemed like they knew. He felt like a mouse trapped in a cage of snakes. Fresh prey.

 

His violin was a beautiful instrument. The wood was a dark, matte brown, the shine long gone from being well loved and played on. It was his mother’s, and before that, his grandfather’s. It’s been passed down, fixed up, broken in, and now, it was Levi’s. Crouching down to attach the shoulder rest and swipe his rosin across his equally as old bow, he brought the instrument to his chin, and quietly tuned. A and D, D and G, and finally.. A and E. Each pitch, each sound. Each word to the stories he’s shared with no one but himself and his mother. Whatever Erwin had in store, he knew that he would be at least somewhat ready. With his violin, he felt as though he could do anything he set his mind to.

 

Wait.. was that..?

 

“Great. Just in time, Levi.” Erwin’s smile was cynical, almost teasing. Levi barely noticed that he still wore his business casual clothing from their meeting in the store, and was too busy focusing on the stage that was adjusted for him. He was the soloist. “Come up here, this stand is for you, if you need it. You all have out Brahms, right?” he addressed the orchestra, murmurs of uninterested “yes”’s responding to him. A few musicians shifted their sheets of music, pondering on if he was actually serious about this. Erwin kept that smile on his face, even when Levi looked like he was about to crush under the pressure of so much judgment in one space. On top of that, he forgot his music in his case. Realizing this, he inhaled silently, holding his breath as his knees, once again, locked.

 

“I know the piece by memory.”

 

“Oh?” Erwin waved over one of the stage managers from the podium, and within minutes, the extra stand was discarded. Levi suddenly felt more exposed that he had been before. He gripped his violin a little firmer, as his hands were getting a little slick with sweat. Erwin noticed this, a smirk turning on the corner of his lips as he held his baton back up. “Right. We’ll take it six before letter B.”

 

“Wai-”

 

Levi was stunned. He didn’t have time to react. Was Erwin really doing this, throwing him straight into it without any hesitation? He couldn’t ask him, as he was already leading the orchestra through the quick, 3-beat measures. He had to play, right? Was this all part of his plan? Was he about to humiliate him?

 

_Shock, confusion, anger, embarrassment, rage… If I can’t ask Erwin myself, I’ll just give him something to answer._

 

And suddenly, he began. His bow touched the string exactly how he wanted to, and he took his time with the phrases. He accentuated each accent, meeting and leaving the note as if they were words. _Why did you set me up? Why did you put me on the spot?_ His nimble fingers worked quickly, building up to the first grand ending of the phrase. It was then, did the orchestra begin to respond. As he went quiet, the orchestra followed. His eyes finally closed as he established a calmer approach. Calming notes came, as if he accepted what was going on.

_I assume that you tried to do this to humiliate me. You’re sly, even more so than I expected. Allow me to retaliate._

 

And with that, the first movement was passed back and forth. The music was no longer notes on a page, but a conversation between the raven-haired violinist and blonde conductor. This went on for quite a while, Levi speaking for the most part while Erwin answered minimally. He knew that they wouldn’t be speaking for the entire time, even if that was so desired. He had another person he needed to talk with, and that person would be the concertmaster himself.

 

_Let me show you. If you gave the Maestro that much distaste, I’ll show you what “cadenza” actually means._

 

The hall was silent, save for Levi’s notes. His pitches were crisp and perfect, and his technique was flawless. His triple stops sounded almost like three violins, and his doubles definitely sounded like two. Their harmonies never failed to slip from their perfect tune, and Levi couldn’t see it right now, but the musicians behind him seemed to be entranced by his music alone. The woodwind section was particularly chatty, having mastered the art of doing so without Erwin overhearing.

“He’s quite good, just as the Maestro said.” whispered Historia, the small blonde Levi remembered earlier. She was a few inches shorter than the raven soloist himself, with large blue eyes and a head of golden blonde hair. She turned to her stand partner, the principal oboist, Petra Ral. “What do you think?”

 

“He’s attractive.” the strawberry blonde returned, her tone a little breathless beneath her surprise. Her eyes were fixed on him, as was most of everyone else’s. "Absolutely beautiful." Similar to his playing, Levi was a breath of fresh air. He was that fire this symphony needed to help neutralize the internal tension. When he finished on his trill and last note of the cadenza, Erwin continued the movement on to the finish, and then cut the orchestra off.  


Levi lowered his instrument, and did not open his eyes. He was waiting for the second movement, of course. He didn’t know what else Erwin was going to spring on him, whether it be a continuation of this song or a whole different concerto. When he failed to hear the opening note, however, he turned, looking back at the orchestra with an innocent confusion. Some were impressed, others whispering such. Erwin held back a satisfied smile. “Very well. We’ll take a break for the stage to adjust, and then we’ll continue with Mozart to end the night. This is Levi, by the way.” A large hand gestured towards the slightly off-balance violinist, still looking as if he was a deer looking straight on into the headlights. “Ten minutes, be back here at about seven-thirty.”

 

During that time, many came up to Levi. The first was Eren Jaeger, who caught him backstage trying to find his Brahms music. “E-Excuse me, Mister Levi?” he began. Levi turned, his straight face only causing the young adult to stammer and stutter a little more than before. “Your-... playing is amazing, even better than some people here. It’s great to have you with us. O-Oh, Armin!” He waved his friend over, an equally as nervous blonde with a bob haircut. Levi knew exactly who they were. They were stand partners. The boy’s bright cerulean gaze looked up almost a little childishly. His lips erupted with a smile.

 

“Levi, right? I loved hearing you! Sometimes, I thought your violin was a voice. It was so enjoyable to listen to. So, where are you from? How did you even get to know the maestro?”

 

These musicians were a little nicer than he anticipated. It was a relief. Levi seemed to visibly relax, the tension in his shoulders relaxing almost as much as when he was playing. “I’ve been in the area all my life. The maestro, I met at Mitras Supermarket. I-..” he froze, obviously fumbling over his words. Should he really tell them about his job? He took a breath before speaking again. “I work there. We kind of ran into each other.”

 

After his conversation with the two young men, Levi caught back up with Erwin. One exchange of glances, and he knew that he should follow him back towards a hallway nearby. He had to talk to him. While his violin conveyed his words to himself, vocal communication might have been better in this moment. Right now, however, Levi didn’t know what to say. Should he be angry? Embarrassed? Grateful? Erwin opened the door to his dressing room, looking back to see Levi catching the door with his free hand. His other held his instrument and bow. Rather than speaking up, he remained silent. He wanted to see what he had to say.

 

“What was that, Erwin? Why did you make me play?” The shorter male blurted out without hesitation, confidence searing in his form. He looked straight into that steady, illuminated blue gaze with his own. It looks like he went with the anger in his chest, considering his furrowed brows. “I could have messed up. I could have humiliated myself in front of everyone, including you. I could have traumatized my passion for this goddamn-”

 

“Did you see the look on Marlowe’s face when you finished the cadenza?” Erwin interrupted, leaning against the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest. His eyes twinkled with amusement. “He looked upset, but I could tell he was learning by watching you. He was envious at your musicality, and at your ability to express what you thought through your playing. Not only that, but I could feel the exact same thing. Levi, you truly have a gift, and thankfully, my assumptions about you were right.”

 

“What assumptions?” Levi pressed.

 

“That you know what you’re talking about.” Erwin straightened. “I heard from a friend that you’ve bought every Philharmonic record that the store down the street has to offer. I would assume that someone who knows how Marlowe played that solo is pretty up to date on what had been going on within the orchestra. Though, let’s just call it a lucky guess.” he decided to finish, winking gently. Levi shook his head, scoffing.

 

“I don’t get it. I’m nobody. I shouldn’t be here, I’m not even in college. I’ve never taken a lesson, or watched you guys in person. I’m getting judged, I-”

 

“Levi.” Erwin’s voice was more pressing than before. He looked the man in the eyes this time, and to emphasize his concern, a hand rested lightly against his shoulder. He could tell that the stress of this was starting to eat away at his mind, but he was quicker. He was the conductor for a reason. “It’s not about the fame. What you showed the other musicians out there is exactly that. Do you know the story behind Mahler’s fourth?”

 

Levi couldn’t break away from the oceans within the man’s eyes, even if he wanted to. They immersed him in a sudden, overwhelming wave of trust. He was speaking one thing, and thinking another. He could understand it all, and swallowed harshly before speaking. His heart was pounding so loud, he could hear it in his ears. “Of course. It starts out as a symphony, but the fourth movement is almost completely different. It’s a child’s song, something about… about heaven, about looking at it through prepubescent eyes.” His nose wrinkled. “There’s something about sacrificing a lamb in it too, right? It’s pretty abstract, but Mahler was kind of a weird guy.”

 

There it was, that honey laugh again. Though, this time, it was followed by the sound of Erwin clearing his throat. He nodded. “Exactly. That’s all I need to know that you’re qualified.”

 

“Qualified? For what?”

 

“For this. For my orchestra.” Erwin held out a large hand, lips turning up with a polite smile. “Welcome to the Sina Philharmonic, Levi.”

 

“Can you do that?”

 

“Of course. Logistics need to be worked out, but I’m not letting you leave until this rehearsal’s over.”

 

“What am I going to play?”

 

“Second chair.” _So.. next to Marlowe. That’s going to be interestingly competitive._

 

Levi waited a few moments, his hand shaking Erwin’s firmly. Counting half a minute in his head, he exhaled a soft breath, knowing for sure that this was real. He nodded, even more so than before. “Right. Okay.” he confirmed, stepping back with a straighter stance. He bowed slightly in respect. “Well, Maestro. Thank you. I look forwards to playing under your direction.”

 

“And I can’t wait to hear you play again. However, before we return on stage, I just want to ask one more thing.” Erwin halted Levi before he could move again, reaching a hand out, and then allowing it to fall to his side. His gaze was still just as captivating, and they glimmered with interest. Levi was such a short, level-headed individual. “After tonight, please give me your contact information. Phone, email, whatever you’re willing to share. I want to make sure you’re forwarded call times and rehearsal schedules, and… where to send a paycheck.” He almost forgot people were paid to do this. His stomach tightened at that. He could buy a few more clothes each month with that allowance. He thought about the question for a moment, before giving Erwin a positive answer. “Of course. I’ll do that after tonight.”

 

This wasn’t a dream, was it? He wasn’t imagining all of this, right? Levi returned to the stage with the other musicians, his violin cleaned with a handkerchief to take the sweat off of the fingerboard. Erwin was chatting with as if he was a friend, his stand partner was trying to wish death upon him, and he’s already got two friends and a couple of admirers out there among the group of players. This wasn’t what he expected the symphony to look like, but he was truly excited to see what was yet to come. If this was what came out of restocking the tea and coffee aisle, maybe he’d start doing it every day.

 


	3. Agitato

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi starts to test the waters of what authority he has, and makes some new friends.

Four days ago, Levi Ackerman was nothing more than another breathing body in a busy city. He worked two jobs, checked the record store daily, and listened to old records well into the night. If anyone were to tell him a week ago that he would be playing with the very orchestra he listened to every day, he would have laughed. Well, considering he wasn’t one to have such outbursts, he’d probably respond in a negative manner. Such things could never happen to him.

 

And then, they did.

 

Levi had to give up one job to make time for rehearsals down at the Cathedral, and decided with leaving the bakery. It was a bittersweet goodbye, especially considering he’d been working there for over ten years, but upon explaining his leave, his boss understood. In fact, he was impressed. “My own bread baker, a musician in the Sina Phil!” he would go on, bragging about the new job to whoever was willing to listen. This was Levi’s first taste at something Erwin had been hearing for years.

 

The first few days of rehearsing were days of adjustment. Levi had never been under the instruction of a conductor before, though he  listened to the two symphonies they were playing more than three times. He studied the first violin part he was given religiously, and it certainly paid off in the evening. He knew when the trumpets would come in, how many measures he needed to count as rests, when he should start listening for that clarinet cue, and finally, how to phrase that famous line of the Mozart. Such a beautiful, amusing piece. Each time they went over it, he lost himself in the notes. Everything blended together so beautifully, from the phrases to the transitions. The further Levi played, the more he remembered why he’d been playing for so long, and why he didn’t just quit when he knew he couldn’t climb to well-paid fame. Music healed the body and soul. To him, it wasn’t about the fame. It was about sharing the gift of Mozart and Mahler.

 

He learned that this was not the case for everyone, however. Bitterness was shared between some musicians, especially in the string section. The other three that shared the highest spots had it the worst. The concertmaster was the musician that usually communicated how bowings should be organized through each phrase, and what would be the best way to speak each line. However, Marlowe was not only irritated at the fact that he had a new stand partner, but Levi also disagreed with the way he was explaining things.

 

“Break into a down bow at the beginning of the b-flat, so the note can project louder.” The black-haired, bowl-cut man whispered to the stand behind him, instantly catching Levi’s attention. He’d been listening to what Erwin was trying to explain to the woodwinds, but this was something so surprising, he had to tune in to the conversation. Breaking the phrase with another bowing? They could get through it so easily, though. Again, his confidence surged, and he spoke before it was too late.

 

“What? Why are you doing that? The bows should be slower and drawn out up to the b-flat. I wouldn’t break the slur with another bowing.”

Oh, how wrong he was to have spoken out. The two stand partners behind him exchanged a very confused, very wary glance when he turned to look back towards them. Levi was confused, up until he saw the reason why. Marlowe’s foul gaze seared a hole through the middle of his face.

 

“Do not. Question. My choices.” he seethed through his teeth, brows dipping in anger. Those were the only words he spoke to the other, before preparing for the next measure number Erwin called out.

 

Levi felt the back of his head ache and his body stiffen. He felt both angry and as if he wanted to run off this stage and back into the green room. Why did Marlowe try to prove that his point was right? A short exhale huffed from his nose as he played, trying to keep down the strong urge to retaliate what the concertmaster spat at him. He didn’t want this to go on for the rest of the season.

 

“After this set, We usually have a week off, and then we regroup to prepare for the next concert. The next month will be the last concert series of the season, so I want to go all out on it. I’m thinking An American in Paris, followed with some Bernstein and John Adams. What do you think, Levi?”

 

“Is Marlowe really that pompous?” The conductor and violinist were now in Erwin’s dressing room. Levi was given permission to place his case in the room, as well as take his instrument out and tune in there as well. Erwin wanted to give him a place that was a little less crowded as the green room. That, and he trusted Levi’s confident tongue to give him feedback not many other musicians of the orchestra could respond with without fear of judgement. At the sudden question of the other violinist, however, he huffed a laugh.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Oh, come on. Don’t make me elaborate. First, you make me play his concerto, and then, you sit me right next to him for rehearsals. He nearly killed me when I questioned his bow markings. Is he just that stiff of a guy?”

 

“He broke up with his fiancee a couple of weeks ago. She’s the principal cellist.”

 

Levi froze from cleaning his strings, and slowly looked back towards Erwin. He arched a brow, almost in disbelief. From Erwin’s sympathetic gaze, however, he could tell that he was serious. He exhaled, silence prompting him to speak again. “It wasn’t messy, it just didn’t work out. He’s just been moody since, and adding someone like you into the mix must have added on to his stress.”

 

“So, you want him to crack under the pressure?”   


“Not at all. I want to rekindle that fire. I want to see if he still wants a fighting chance as the first chair.” Suddenly, his gaze turned cunning. A smirk danced across his lips. “Why bring this up? Are you implying that I instead make you the concertmaster?”

 

Levi cleared his throat, nervously turning back to his instrument. That gaze was becoming too much for him to prolong. “I’ve gotta get to work.”

 

“Let me drive you down.”

 

“It’s alright, it’s just down the street.”

 

There was something about Erwin that made him feel awfully different. Rather than mimicking his tone, which perceived comfort, he felt on-edge or airy whenever he conversed with Erwin. It was odd, and definitely something he’d never experienced before. Perhaps it was just nerves mixed with, you know, meeting one of the biggest idols of his life. Maybe he’d just get over it within a few days.

 

It was about a week to the concert date, now. Rehearsals went by easily, and beneath Erwin’s instruction, they were easing into a pretty good end result. Many violinists in Eren’s section agreed that Levi’s addition to the orchestra was having a positive effect on the music overall, while others came up to him in the middle of rehearsal to tell him such. He’d been able to meet so many faces he thought he would never even see in person. To him, the musicians were celebrities, but now, they were friends.

 

“Levi! Do you want to come with us for dinner?”

 

Eve of the day before the dress rehearsal, Levi found himself being called over by Eren’s group of friends. With him and Armin, there were also a few others he’d come to know over the week of a couple weeks. There was Mikasa, the principal violist, Jean, the clarinetist, Marco, the second flautist, and Ymir, the principal trombonist. Historia and Petra were also there, along with a few he didn’t recognize. Well.. he didn’t have much to lose, right? Looking over to Eren, he nodded. “Sure. Where are you all thinking of going?”

 

“The Grotto, down the block.” Eren grinned. “You’ll love it, I promise. We just have to wait for a few more people, though.”

 

A few more? How many were going down there tonight? Levi kept silent for now as he followed the others outside, trailing behind the group and trying to spot who they were picking up. Some faces he recognized, others he didn’t. One of them happened to be the principal cellist. Her name was Hitch, right? She seemed nice, speaking with the other musicians. Three more people joined them; a bass player taller than Erwin with caramel-toned skin and dark brown hair, a blonde cello player that probably worked out every chance he got, and a blonde female who played trumpet. She looked intimidating, but if Levi could handle the concertmaster, he could take on another. Plus, they seemed like they all knew each other enough to have a pleasant dinner. He greeted them with a polite nod.

 

“You’re that newbie that played the Brahms, right?” asked the muscular cellist, patting Levi on the shoulder. He had a lopsided smile on his face. “It was pretty awesome. I’m Reiner, this is Bertolt and Annie. We joined the symphony about two years ago.”

 

“Three, now!” A brunette called from the other side of the group. She had her hair tied back in ponytail, loose strands and long side bangs framing her face. She smiled in Levi’s direction. “We’ve all been here for at least three years, but have known each other longer than that. We all went to the Conservatory together.” she explained, walking over to the shorter ravenette. She stopped, however, upon noticing something. “Hey.. you look taller on stage, when everyone’s sitting down.”

 

“Uh...” Levi responded, causing a wave of laughter to ripple through the group. His grey eyes scanned their cheerful faces, and he calmed down. “I’m not that short, I don't think. You guys sound just as good as I do, anyways.”

 

“No way. You probably blasted through competitions when you were a kid, right?” Jean piped up. “They don’t have that stuff for wind players. I had to suffer eight years of concert band at my school.”

 

“At least you had band. My school didn’t even have an orchestra class.” Eren grumbled. “And, for the record, those competitions are intimidating. Levi probably scared the rest of those competitors into forfeiting.”

 

“I’ve never competed.”

 

“What?!” Armin’s brows raised. The other young adults seemed pretty shocked. Before they could ask any questions, Levi shrugged. “It wasn’t my thing, and.. I never knew where to look. I didn’t even know they existed until a couple years ago.”

  
“Wait.. Mister Levi, with all due respect, just how old are you?” asked Historia, her shoulder leaned against Ymir’s form.

 

“Twenty eight, I’ll be twenty nine in a few weeks.”

 

Again, looks of shock were on the faces on all the musicians around him. One brave soul, that belonging to another violinist named Connie, decided to speak. “No wonder you’ve got so much experience, and you look younger than your age.”

 

Levi furrowed his brows darkly, emitting a slight frown. “Thanks.”

 

The restaurant the younger group decided to go to was a cross between a formal- and family-style venue. It was definitely for a more adult crowd, considering the fancier portion sizes yet childish-like options. Were those onion rings he saw, as he was walking towards a table? He’d never been somewhere like this before. It made his chest flutter and his stomach growl. Oh, right. He skipped lunch today, and upon realizing that, he was surprised to feel how hungry he was. Perhaps that excitement was lightheadedness from the lack of food.

 

“Let’s split the bill, yeah?”   


“Sure. I’ll pay for Levi’s meal.”

 

“Oh, you really don’t have-”

 

“Nonsense! You’re our new player, it’s only fair that we give you a night you can enjoy.” The one who spoke out about his complimentary dinner was Petra. She strategized her seating arrangement, and was able to steal a spot right across from the petite raven. He looked up with a straight face, nodding to her with a softer metal gaze. “Well.. thank you. I won’t get anything too drastically priced.”

 

“Levi, don’t worry. We’re here to treat you.”

 

When the group got their hands on some beer bottles, Levi opted for something a little less alcoholic; unsweetened iced tea. While he enjoyed the occasional drink in the past, he wanted to make sure he got his thoughts cleared and his mind ready for the concert within a few days. He was the new guy, the fresh meat. If he was seen on stage with a massive hangover, even after having a day to recover, that would be more humiliating than what the conductor put him through on his first day. His face tensed at the mere thought of it. No, not a sip of any wine, beer, shot, or anything passed his way. His tea would be just fine.

 

“So, Levi.” Reiner began with a hum, swirling his beer in his glass. They just finished their food orders, and now had enough time to chat about some of the most pressing topics the younger musicians had for Levi. The blonde’s smile was a little mischievous. “You and the Maestro get along together pretty well. Don’t you keep your stuff in his dressing room?”

 

Obliviously, Levi responded. “Yeah. It’s a pretty big room, so I’m allowed a chair to set up my instrument and a stand.”

 

Snickers rippled through the group. Levi’s cheeks burned, and immediately he questioned their whispering. “What are you on about?” he asked, his tone colder than before. The result of this was more laughter.

 

“It’s obvious, you know. Almost the whole orchestra knows that you two are a thing.”

 

...What? They had to be kidding.

 

Him and Erwin? God, never. They were complete opposites.

 

Erwin wasn’t even gay. He dated that famous violinist woman a few years ago.

 

Right?

 

No, him and Erwin couldn’t be together.

 

Then again, his dreams _were_ starting to come true.

 

“I’m going to the bathroom. Don’t eat my fries while I’m gone.”

 

Suddenly, Levi stood from the table and made a quick escape. He didn’t answer the question mainly because of how off guard he was caught on it. Were rumors already going around about him, within the orchestra? He hasn’t even been here for a month! Once inside the men’s restroom, he turned on the faucet and splashed a bit of water on his face.

 

_Erwin could never, would never. Should never, even. Wouldn’t I taint his reputation? A lowlife newbie taken off the streets, suddenly the conductor’s partner and second chair of the Philharmonic. People would despise me. They would think I was given the advantage because of my personal relationship with Erwin._

 

_But why and I getting ahead of myself? He’d never take interest in me._

 

And then, his phone rang. Levi jumped when he heard it, and he quietly ducked out of the bathroom to see who it was. Speak of the devil.

 

“Maestro Smith?”

 

“Hi, Levi. Oh.. are you busy? I can hear a bit of noise in the background.” The smooth voice on the other line inquired, his tone both soft and a bit tired. They really practiced for a while today, so he wouldn’t blame him. Levi, however, wasn’t going to tell him the truth that easily.

 

“I can make myself available. What’s the matter?”

 

“Please, don’t worry yourself over it, I was just wondering if you were free either tonight and tomorrow. I wanted to ask you about next year’s set.” Erwin was leaving out bits and pieces, but to have the chance to talk to him about the repertoire? It was a chance he couldn’t miss. Levi looked up to the table, and held his cellphone a little closer to his ear.

 

“Can we plan for tomorrow? I’m having dinner with some of the other musicians. I would love to tonight, but conversing with them might help me with adapting to the orchestra.”

 

“Of course! Just text me for a time, or call. Whatever is okay for you.”

 

This couldn’t have been a worse time. Levi exhaled when he hung up, striding back over to the group and desperately trying not to make too much of a commotion. Most of the people there were either starting to get a little tipsy, or starting on their meal of fried food and cheesy appetizers. While he enjoyed a good mozzarella stick, he really wanted to get something with some nutritional value, as he didn’t know when he would have the time to eat again. For that reason, he got a large chicken caesar salad, with a side of fries just out of spite. The group looked over at him, but rather than continue the subject they were carrying on before, they seemed a little uneasy and hesitant.

 

“We’re sorry we teased you, Levi. We really didn’t mean it.” Historia started.

 

“It was only a joke.” continued Eren sincerely.

 

“Really, the last thing we want to do is make you uncomfortable. We got you an extra side of fries to make up for it.” finished Jean.

 

Levi was taken aback, but… relaxed, now. He shook his head, holding up a hand to reassure them. “It’s alright, it wasn’t that bad of a question. If you want an answer, it’s simply no, we’re far from ever being a thing.” And, you know, it was better that way. He didn’t want to create more drama when there was enough in the orchestra to begin with. With a half-smile, he picked up his fork. “Now, excuse me while I demolish this salad. That Mahler took a lot of strength to get through.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry. If this wasn't Eruri, I wouldn't have added the tag.


	4. Larghetto

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi takes a breather and gets to know Erwin. Spoiler alert, they talk nothing about the concert's music.

Levi awoke the next morning to his phone ringing. Expecting it to just be his alarm, he groggily stuck out a hand to grab the small device, catching it just before it vibrated off his nightstand. He went to slide the screen so it could snooze for five more minutes, but he suddenly looked at it a little closer when he realized what it was. Erwin was calling him.

 

“What..?” he mumbled to himself. His hair stuck out in opposite directions, heavy eyelids signaling a satisfied, long sleep. He was practically bare, save for a pair of briefs and socks. Kicking the sheets off his form and sitting up, he took a moment to compose himself and clear his throat. He coughed loudly, not wanting to make it sound like he just woke up. Technically, he didn’t have to be at work until noon, considering he left his bakery job, which was why he'd been asleep for so long.

 

“Hello?”

 

“Hi, Levi, it’s me. I just wanted to confirm our time for today.” Erwin’s voice seemed clear as day, as if he’d been up for hours. He probably was, as Levi slept in until nine o’clock, once checking the time of his alarm. Remembering the memory of texting Erwin when to meet up this morning, he felt his stomach tighten and his head feel light. This was actually happening. He was going to meet with the love of his-

 

_Music._ Love of his-.. partner-... acquaintance that loved music just as he did.

 

Smooth.

 

Showering and getting ready with his usual morning routine, Levi decided on a seasonal outfit for today. As winter was approaching its peak, the snow was starting to fall, and it would only get worse as time went on. He wore a black long-sleeved turtleneck, and on top of that, a dark red knit sweater that had two rows of buttons down the front. It wasn’t baggy, and it shaped what little of a waist he had. For a man, his physique was quite graceful, but beautiful in a way.  It kind of resembled a cross between a dancer’s or bicyclist’s form, just without most of the muscle mass. The strongest thing Levi could do was move boxes up to fifty pounds within the grocery store’s inventory.

 

Adding black pants and those same black sneakers, Levi checked the time. Alright, a couple more hours before he had to meet with Erwin. What were they going to talk about? How long was he going to stay over there? Most importantly, Levi still felt like he was living on a dream. He was thrown into this orchestra at full force, and thankfully, was able to partially survive the consequences. Still, he wanted to ask the conductor his motives for doing such.

 

He spent his short morning by eating a small breakfast of some small pieces of toast and black tea before heading out. Instead of having a private meeting in his stupid apartment complex, he was actually going to meet Erwin in his home, after being insisted that that would be the best place to converse on their musical opinions. He had mostly all the scores at home, as well. He would meet the tall blonde at the corner of a sidewalk not too far from where he lived, and would be given a ride back to his place. As of now, he stood right in that spot, his violin case snug against his back and standing with his feet touched together. His hands remained in his pockets, one protectively against the small screen of his phone.

 

His mind stirred as he waited, and he couldn’t help thinking about what was going to come about this. _What if Marlowe has done this? Was this something he did with every musician? Did he always get close with each performer? That would be pretty cool, but.. It would also be cool to be the only one doing this. I mean, we just met, but it seems like I’ve known him longer than this. I kind of have, in a way. I’ve listened to his music for years, now._

 

_...Is that a Bentley?_

 

He was sure he would have collapsed then and there if it wasn’t for his mind forcing him to remain presentable. His eyes certainly showed surprise at the beautiful car, and his cheeks were flustered when they met with the shining blues of the gorgeous man driving it. Thank god it was him, and not some spiffy chauffeur. Erwin’s smile was friendly, and once parked, got out to greet Levi formally. “Good morning. I’m glad we could find a time to meet.” He wore a grey v-neck layered with a thick dark blue jacket, as well as a pair of black pants and brown loafers. Suddenly, Levi felt very underdressed. And shy. He peered down, responding with a nod.

 

“I agree. Uh.. nice car.”

 

“Thank you. It used to be my father’s.”

 

The drive didn’t take more than ten minutes. The ride through the city, with the occasional commentary about the weather, definitely calmed down Levi’s nerves. He looked out the window most of the time, almost in awe at just how far out Erwin actually lived. His house was in a quiet neighborhood, on a street with homes just as large as his. On the subject of size, it must have been classified as a manor. It had a very elegant aura and aesthetic, with a groomed garden in front and a beautiful double-door, victorian-styled entrance. Levi was almost overwhelmed, and he wasn’t even inside yet. Did Erwin really live alone? It looked like he was getting ready to start a family, with the amount of house he had. He didn’t exactly want to pry, though. Silently, he walked through the patio as Erwin led him, keeping his light grey eyes on the pathway and flowers.

 

“You could have a concert here.” he blurted out before he could stop himself.

 

Erwin raised a brow, chuckling lightly. “I’ve pondered it. I’ve had a few chamber group rehearsals here, but nothing more past that. I’ve just never gotten the idea of it.”

 

That’s right. Aside from conducting, Erwin’s secondary instrument was violin. His primary was piano, and it was said in his biography that he’d picked up different string, woodwind, and brass instruments in the past. Levi wondered how many he truly knew how to play.

The inside was even more beautiful. Golden accents lined the mahogany staircase upon first walking in, and once directed to the living room by the right, it suddenly turned to either a window or a bookcase. The white couch was long and L-shaped in front of the television, with enough blankets and pillows to certainly live in a world of bliss. It was comforting, but in a way a mall display of a seating area was. There was only so much space a man could take up, and it was evident that Erwin didn’t visit that area often. The kitchen and study, however, he could tell that they were quite lived in. They sat down in the study, a room that seemed to have been a small bedroom at one time. There was lots of space, a violin stand with an instrument in it, a music stand with a few sonatas Levi recognized, and the elephant in the room, with was a baby rosewood grand piano. Its top was closed, but it was tucked into the corner, as if it was moved in there to intentionally not be played. Erwin offered tea, and Levi accepted.

 

“I hope you’re not feeling too engulfed by all of this.” Erwin started in a quiet tone as he returned, two cups of tea and coasters in his hand. Levi sat on the sofa, his violin case on the ground and one leg crossed over the other. He didn’t want to move, in fear of accidentally touching or breaking something, but when given the tea, he picked up the cup carefully by the brim, sipping it. Erwin was still a little nervous. "By this, I guess I mean everything. The orchestra, my home... it's alright to object." 

 

“I’m not particularly engulfed, just… a little blindsided.” Levi began. His tone was a little shaky, but his thought process was steady. The atmosphere helped him calm down. “I really don’t understand why, or-... or how you thought I was a violinist. I’m so confused. I don’t know what to think.”

 

“I understand.” Erwin sat across from Levi, in an armchair. He draped an ankle over the other knee, and his eyes were down to the coffee table in thought for a moment. They seemed a little less bright than before. “Let me start from when I met your name. I saw the sales in our records start to increase, particularly in a consistent manner. Seeing this, I asked for a name out of curiosity, which is what led me to research.”

 

“You stalked me?” Levi snorted. Erwin smiled sheepishly.

 

“I’d like to call it investigative research. I wanted to know more about the person who would go out and buy even the worst recordings of each set. I knew whoever they were, they obviously hadn’t gone to the live performances beforehand. When I found out who you were, though, I was definitely interested in your… musical recognition.”

 

Aside from what Levi told the other musicians, he did attend a few performances, due to his mother and uncle’s request. One that stood out was for a city council member’s gig, which was held publicly and with video recordings. Levi was no older than eight then, but he was truly the center of attention. The music he played was apart of an event that highlighted younger players at the time. He was the token musician, though, as his playing certainly impressed the older, richer crowd. That was the only time he played, though. The wide eyes in his face were enough to show his surprise.

“That was years ago. I’m impressed you found that. Your research skills are almost scarily invasive.”

 

“I don’t do those things often, and again, it was only out of curiosity. Please, don’t get the idea that I do that with everyone.” Erwin attempted to reassure, but due to Levi’s small, teasing smirk, he didn’t need to enforce it. He shook his head, a smile of his own curving on his lips. “You know your music, and you can expand it farther than just notes and phrasing. I feel that we had a mutual understanding and passion for each composition in a way that can only be expressed through the music itself.”

 

Levi nodded. “I don’t want to be very hubris, but I agree. I was able to tell how you phrased the orchestra in the last recording to try and pick up Marlowe’s shabby performance. Thankfully, it worked. The orchestra sounded great.” On that note, their conversation turned friendly. Small words about the performance were shared, and the nerves began to dwindle as the tea cooled down. The shorter raven took longer sips. It was the green tea he suggested to Erwin at few weeks ago.

 

Seeing that it was almost noon, Levi knew that he had to leave within the next few hours. The two men shared quite a lot of things, from what they thought about the last set, to the upcoming concert, and their plans for their winter break. They would skip the December and January concerts, save for a large Christmas gala the symphony held, and return to the original season in February. Erwin planned on staying home and revisiting his hobby for cooking, while Levi… well, he didn’t know quite yet. He would probably just return to work.

 

“This place seems like a monster to clean.” Levi noted, looking around at the room with a raised brow. Were those cobwebs? _Don’t get prissy about it here… anywhere else, you can complain, come on…_

 

“I used to clean it weekly, but I’ve stopped due to not having enough time.” he admitted, bringing one hand up to card through his blonde hair. This was the first time Levi noticed that it wasn’t slicked back in a side part. It seemed quite soft, very healthy. He must be proud to have such a full head of hair at…

 

...Wait. “How old are you?” Levi asked. After speaking for a few minutes, he felt like he could ask Erwin this. He was met with a more abrupt chuckle, the smile on the other’s face creasing the corners of his eyes.

 

“Don’t make me admit it. I just turned thirty-three in october.”

 

“No need to be ashamed, I’ll be twenty nine on Christmas.”

 

“Really? With all do respect, you don’t look a day over nineteen. It’s impressive.”

 

“I’d like to call it my mother’s genetics.”

 

“You do speak of your mother often.” Erwin noted, straightening out his crossed legs. His blue eyes seemed more focused than before. He did want to know more about Levi’s past life. “Was she an important figure in your life?”

 

“Mm.” Levi nodded. “She encouraged me to start violin, and she was my teacher up until I was fifteen, when she passed away. She had tuberculosis.”

 

“I’m sorry to hear that.” Erwin immediately regretted his pestering, but Levi looked to be unaffected.

 

“It’s alright, it was long ago.”

 

“She set you up for success, most definitely.” Erwin was going to go on, but instead, rested a hand against his chest for a moment. He almost massaged his sternum, looking uneasy. Levi caught sight of it, even if it was subtle.

 

“Are you alright?” he asked, his tone quiet.

 

“Yes. Just… heartburn.” Oh, that was a good topic to get on. His smile suddenly came back. “You know, that ginger tea has been working wonderfully. It’s better than coffee, in my opinion.”

 

Levi perked up at the subject of tea. His grey eyes became light with interest. “Yeah? I hate the taste of it, it makes me gag. My mother used to prepare it for me all the time when I was little, and even added milk. It really tastes like being in the comfort of your own home. I highly recommend it from time to time.” It felt nice to talk about small things like this. He hasn’t been able to do such for a while. Visibly relaxing, he leaned against the couch, and rested an arm against the back of the frame. “So, Erwin.. You know a lot about me, but I don’t know a whole lot about you. How did you get into conducting?”

 

Erwin’s eyes flickered. On top of the indigestion he had just moments ago, Levi could send that he was still growing tense. He didn’t want to press about what was wrong, though, so he allowed the blonde male to speak. “As you probably know, I used to be a very famous pianist. I was traveling the world for a while after graduating the Conservatory with a master’s degree, and I loved the socialization of meeting new people. Of course, that also meant I learned more pieces. I was quite headstrong in my playing, and I remember not being able to quiet myself about suggestions for the orchestra during the rehearsals. In a way, I was like you to Marlowe.” he chimed, causing Levi to look away shyly. It was true, about the way he spoke up to the concertmaster so often. The silence prompted Erwin to speak again. “I went back to school to get a conducting degree, and within days, I was given this job. I truly love it. The young musicians have so much fire and potential, which is half the reason why I decided to throw you into the mix. The balance of the performers is like a breath of fresh air, and you can really see it in the music.”

 

“You’re not saying I’m old and snarky, right?”

 

“That could be farther from the truth. You should see how the violinists look up to you. You’re a role model for them, as well as the rest of the orchestra. Hell, even myself.”  

 

That last line caused Levi to blush a little darker than before. He looked down to the ground, ending the subject for now. He was definitely flattered, but he still couldn’t see why he was able to catch Erwin’s attention. He was low-paid, living on monthly paychecks. He didn’t even have enough for lunch today because of his water bill. Speaking of which, after checking the time, he huffed.   


“Great. I have to be at the Supermarket in an hour. I guess I should get going.”

 

“Are you going to get lunch?”   
  
“I-... uh…” Yeah, that was the last thing he wanted to tell Erwin. _Come on, think up a good excuse. Just say you always get free ones at the store._

 

Those blue eyes looked farther than his lying gaze. Thick, dark blonde eyebrows furrowed up with concern when he heard Levi’s hesitation, and he knew from then on the truth of the matter. Wordlessly, he stood, gesturing the petite man to follow him. “I’ll make us something, we can have lunch here.”

 

Levi really couldn’t see how Erwin wasn’t married with eight thousand kids yet. The guy was practically the living dream of every woman ever. He was tall, seemingly muscular, a gentle and patient nature, a wonderful smile. On top of that, he also had a nice car, a spacious home, a very well-paying job, and he could cook. Levi sat at the countertop stool, his elbows resting against the island as he watched the man cook. His back was turned to him, an apron tied with a small bow resting on the small of his back. His gaze was half-lidded, lazy, but quite content. From what he could smell, it was some form of a skillet recipe. Whatever it was, though, it smelled exactly like the holidays outside. He couldn’t wait to eat it, as his stomach complained loudly for more food, but… the process was just as entertaining.

 

_He must work out. He has to have a gym somewhere in here, definitely. I wonder how much he can lift? It’s not like he’s super buff, but he’s definitely nowhere close to being unhealthy.  His back seems so strong, and his arms… and his waist… and his butt…_

 

“Gnocchi, blistered tomatoes, a bit of chicken sausage, and a handful of basil.” A plate served to him broke him from his thoughts. He looked down to the plate, and was met with a generous portion of the small pieces of potato-based dough, tomatoes, and an absolutely gorgeous smell filling his nostrils. His eyes were wide, and upon looking up and back down. Picked up the silver fork to his right. “Thank you.” he murmured, exasperatedly so, before digging in to the meal immediately. Erwin was just sitting down with his own plate when he did so, smilingly solemnly at the sight before him.

 

“I know this is hard to believe, but I understand where you’re coming from. I remember, back in high school, I did a lot of gigs and paid performances just to get myself by.”

 

“Oh?” Levi hummed, swallowing before speaking again. He slowed his eating pace out of embarrassment. “I used half of what I get to pay for records I buy. It’s a sacrifice, but it’s one I’m willing to make for music.”

 

“You really should put your health first, it’s quite important.”

 

“That sounds more like a suggestion rather than a concern.”

 

“Well, it is. From here on out, I’ll make sure that you’re eating well even if I have to help you.” Erwin proposed, the idea coming to his head when he spoke. Levi almost choked on a charred tomato. He looked up, almost in shock.

 

“You really don’t have to.”

 

“I insist. You’re a musician in my orchestra.”

 

“A musician among, what, ninety people?”

 

“Well, if you think you’re common, why don’t you audition for the concertmaster position next year?”

 

“I don’t want to get my head chopped off, no thank you.”

 

“The judges wouldn’t be too intimidating.”

 

“Who would the judges be?”

 

“Me, myself, and I.” It was almost like Erwin was coaxing him into auditioning. Levi snorted, looking down at his half-eaten plate. He shook his head. “Alright. After tomorrow’s concert, I’ll make preparations for it. When would it be?”

 

“Next month, after string auditions. I’ll send you an email with the details and repertoire later.”

 

“No advantages, right?”

 

“I’ll act as if you both are strangers.”

 

“What about piano accompaniment?”

 

“I’ll hire someone.”

 

“What if you did it?”

 

Suddenly, silence fell. Erwin’s gaze suddenly when numb as if he’d been stabbed, and he looked down at his food to try and hide it. It made Levi tense, cringing. He forgot about why Erwin didn’t play anymore.

 

_After him and Marie broke up, it was said through news articles that he gave up piano out of heartbreak. He hasn’t played it for over six years._

 

“I’m sorry.” Erwin murmured, picking at the food with his fork. “I can’t.”

 

“Don’t worry, I won’t need it. I’ll do Paganini.”

 

The rest of lunch went by relatively smoothly, even if their moods dropped for a little while. Levi was able to pick it up again when he starting talking about tea once again, and the pair shared one more glass before he was given a ride back to his job. If anything, it now almost felt like they were good friends. He trusted Erwin, and his steps felt lighter than before. It was almost ironic, considering he was so full from his earlier meal.

 

Not only was he happy from his visit with Erwin, but he was definitely a little bashful. The conductor had been such a gentleman throughout their visit, giving him a ride, making him lunch, and bidding him goodbye up until their rehearsals. Erwin had been single for a long time, too, but was he ready for a relationship? Even then, was he gay?

 

Confidence was surging through Levi’s form at full force as he shelved a new stack of canned beans. Well, it didn’t hurt to try, and if it didn’t work, he could always just back out of it. When the box of cans was empty, he swiftly took out his phone, and texted Erwin.

 

_Hey, do you want to talk again after tomorrow’s concert. We’ll have a ton of time in the morning and I wanna ask you a few things about the violin part._

 

Not minutes later, he got a response. Levi wondered how fast that guy drove home.

 

_Sure. Does the day after tomorrow work for you?_

 

_Sounds perfect. Don’t forget that concertmaster email. I’ll see you at the dress rehearsal tonight._

 

_I look forward to it._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really enjoy writing Erwin's character development. I do want to keep this story mainly romantic and lighthearted, but every story has to have a twist or jab of angst in it. That being said, there will be more angst to come. Thank you for reading!


	5. Tempo Rubato

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi and Erwin's relationship develops, in more unexpected ways than one. Is Erwin hiding secrets?

One would think getting used to a workspace in a new environment would only take a few days. You were given instructions, directions, where the coffee was, what time to come in, and you were sent on your way. Within a month, you knew the place like the back of your hand.

 

To Levi, this would never occur.

 

Every time he was on that stage, the experience was something magical. The way his bow stroked, the resin picking up in the stage lights, the passion he poured when Marlowe tried to out-play him during each passage… this all connected to a new experience every time. He forgot about what happened before, what happened after. If it was a mistake, it was in the past. No need to dote about it.

 

The concert was something different. Not only was everyone in basic, uniform attire, but the music was just as vigorous as it was on the recordings, doubled and tripled in awe and musicality. Nothing quite met the power of a live performance, and Levi learned that pretty quickly at the start of the Mozart. Instead of it coming from one tiny record player, the experience was all around him. He was immersed within it. He was swimming with the performers rather than remaining stationary and listening.

 

Erwin was the ringleader. Whatever he wanted, they followed, and it was a form of mastery that not just anyone could go up and do. What this man did was something so different and breathtaking, it was definitely worth the standing ovation and multiple shouts of “Bravo”’s he received at the end of the Mahler.

 

Plus, he looked stunning in that tailcoat and an after-performance flush on his face. The lust Levi’s internal system craved of seeing someone he felt so strongly towards made his stomach tighten with his wandering imagination. Day after day, he found his thoughts drifting intimately.

 

Passion overlooked his human response.

 

Levi waited until most of the musicians filed out of the green room and into the dimming Sunday evening. Their final concerts were always mid-afternoon, and many found that it was nice to go out and celebrate after spending such a long time practicing and rehearsing. No.. they wouldn’t need to think about measure lines again until after this winter break was over in January, and then they would return to their rigorous new season with a fresher attitude and even higher motivation to play then.

 

For now, though, Levi stood in the middle of a now cleared stage. The lights were off, save for the illumination of the moon gently lighting the stage and the last few crew members had just left to carry on with their day. Levi managed to sneak out the back door with his case, return through another side entrance, and take his instrument back out in the audience pews.

 

He needed to see this on his own. He needed to hear this for himself.

 

_Never in my life did I think I could be here, or even come close to the building that holds such a beautiful hall. I wonder if my mother can see this._

 

Slowly, he brought the instrument beneath his chin, eyes taking in one last gaze of the millions of empty chairs before him. Just a few hours ago, they were filled to the brim, giving standing ovations for another amazing performance. Now, it was just Levi, holding his wooden instrument, clad in a sweaty black button-down and equally colored slacks and shoes. With an inhale and exhale, he began to play.

 

_Bach’s Violin Sonata in G Minor._

 

His eyes fluttered closed as he played, nimble fingers dancing across the fingerboard mindlessly. He knew this piece inside and out, backwards and forwards. He’s listened to it constantly, from the time he started until now. This piece held so much to him, but how could  anyone know if he didn’t tell them his story? If these concert hall chairs were filled, not a breath would be exhaled the moment his bow hair stroked the string. Even with that nervous thought in his mind, he continued to play.

 

_“Levi, do you see those double- and triple-stops? You shouldn’t be afraid of them. Bach put those there because bows were much different back then.”_

 

_“How so, Mother?”_

 

_“They were curved.” Her finger, extending out from the bed she was bound to, traced the outline of a round mountain above the straight wood of his instrument. “That meant they could play these notes easier. Still, however, we can bow them with the ones we have today.”_

 

_The small raven wrinkled his nose. “I don’t like that. I wanna get a curved bow.”_

 

_“Nonsense, you sound just fine. Play that passage again.”_

 

Why does this memory bring back memories he refused to feel? Why does it tear at his heartstrings and make his breathing shallow? He couldn’t stop, even if he wanted to. He was grateful he was here alone.

 

Or so he thought, as a gaze of tearful blue slipped out of the hall when Levi finished on his last note.

  
  


Off to work. Levi usually took evening shifts on the weekends just to pull in an extra bit of spending money after concerts. However, considering he was in the orchestra, perhaps things would start to change. As of right now, though, he couldn’t just quit after one day, and his position wasn’t even solidified. He came in during the end of the season, who knows what would happen after auditions this holiday season?

  


The following week was stressful, to say the least. Not having another concert to prepare for meant he had to work even more than he did in the past, running twelve-hour shifts just to make sure he had a decently working heater. Snow was coming, and from what the newspaper said, it wasn’t going to let up very soon.

 

In other words, it’ll resemble a blizzard come his birthday.

 

-

 

The next time Levi saw Erwin was another visit to his home. This one was reluctant, as most of the time on his days off he wanted to seek refuge under three blankets and have a cup of tea in his hands, but realizing he could do that with _much_ better resources at Erwin’s home made him change his mind. These visits have gotten more often the longer this snow went on, considering the grocery store had to close on a few days due to weather. Levi has stayed for dinner, but never overnight.

 

Within an hour of him arriving early in the morning, the two were sitting in the living room, curtains drawn, lamps illuminating their messy scene. Cups of steaming black tea sat cooling on coasters. Stacks of scores were piled high on the straining coffee table, a music player close by. Rimsky Korsakov’s powerful Capriccio Espagnol was playing, and both were following along on a score book. It was open on the table, and both were leaning over to read along. Their legs rested comfortably against one another, and as much as Levi wanted to daydream about it becoming more, he was deep in thought on this piece that he nearly disregarded it.

 

“I like that fourth movement. Well.. section. What’s it called?” Levi said immediately after the piece ended, leaning back and rubbing his eyes. He skipped on his morning tea to make it here, so he was obviously a little groggy. Erwin turned, not as tired but definitely in need of something. He picked up his mug by the handle before responding. “Movement. It’s a shift in thought. He put it there to give the music different taste.” 

“Huh. I wouldn’t call something that short a ‘movement.’” Levi mumbled into his cup of tea, closing his eyes when the warm liquid relaxed his system. Erwin sat turned towards him, an arm resting across the back of the couch. Levi tucked a foot on the edge of the couch. Both were visibly comfortable with being this close to one another.

 

“The trumpets are going to have a fun time with that part, regardless.”

 

“Yeah. It’s robust, but really close to having a majestic feel.”

 

“You’re robust.”

 

“Excuse me?”

 

“You.” Levi snickered into another sip, and this time eyed Erwin. His grey eyes sparked with interest. “I mean, as much as I’m joking, I really like seeing you lead the orchestra. Your energy just translates so well across the stage.”

 

“You’re flattering me.” Erwin’s voice was quieter, hushed beneath the noise of a snowy outdoors. His blue gaze focused on the gunmetal grey staring back at him. “I would say the same for you.”

 

“How so?”

“I wouldn’t just tell anyone to play the Brahms concerto by memory. You’ve got an endurance powerful enough to passionately get through something as long as the Mahler, and it’s a relief to look up and meet the eyes of someone who’s willing to keep the musical part of the symphony going. Even after an hour of playing, that fire is still-..”

 

Erwin stopped, taken aback, realizing he’d been rambling his own thought process. He didn’t have time to see Levi’s reaction, which had been a great one at that. His lips were parted slightly, eyes wide in slight disbelief, and his cheeks flushed a splotchy red. He set his cup down, moving silently, hesitantly.

 

“Erwin… did you really think that?” he asked, his voice thin.

 

“I meant every word.”

When their gazes met, he found an exasperating sight.

 

Erwin’s face was just as rosy pink.

 

A wave emotion turned into a supernova of peace as Levi’s lips connected with Erwin’s. He could tell immediately that Erwin wanted to take this slow, after feeling how stiff his body was. Obviously, he returned the favor. There was no time crunch, no rehearsal, no one calling..

 

They had all day.

 

Passion aside, it felt nice to be this close to someone. Levi accepted the hands that timidly searched his waist, pulling his smaller body onto a larger lap. One of his smaller hands took the liberty of running through perfectly silky blonde hair, accompanied by his arm wrapping around his neck. Physically, this felt amazing. He was getting what he craved, something that would make him feel good, and in turn, a positive relationship with his-

 

With an audible gasp, Levi pulled away at the sudden realization, lips slightly plump from the attention they were given. His eyes were wide, and his body was stiff. Erwin immediately grew concerned, almost worried. The look in his eyes was caring.

 

“What’s wrong? Did I go too far?”

 

“No. N-No. God, no, I-..” Levi exhaled, rubbing his face. “We can’t. You’re basically my boss, and with you being in the orchestra for so long, and myself suddenly being thrown in, people are going to start to get suspicious of us, and-”

 

“Levi.” Erwin’s voice was stern, and it made the smaller man look up with obedience. The blue gaze that stared back at him was sincere. “This is between you and I.”

 

_You and I._

 

_Me and him._

 

_Alone together._

 

Levi wanted to hold onto the memories of touches he felt on his body. Cold hands than ran under his shirt made him shiver, and his body reacted pleasantly in turn. He sat with his legs hugging Erwin’s waist, arms around his neck and pulling him closer by the nape of his neck. He smelled amazing, and with every lazy, rocking motion of their kiss, he knew this was where he wanted to stay on his days off.

 

_This is it._

 

_My heart is beating out of my chest._

 

Happiness. It flowed in his heart and sparked when kisses ran down his neck, his shirt teasing his skin to the cold air of the atmosphere. These sensations were making his body uncontrollable beneath the blonde’s touch, causing him, at one point, to hum and exhale occasionally in response to something really letting him relax.

 

Calm, peaceful, arousing. There was nothing sweeter.  

 

Their adult “makeout” morphed back into work when they realized it was too early in the morning to really be fooling around, and once they got back into score-searching, Levi’s thoughts were running wild. What just happened? He made out with Erwin, his lifelong crush. The most handsome guy he’s seen in a long time. _The maestro._ It was a mutual, silent agreement that sent both of them into sheer bliss. He liked it, of course, but where was that coming from? Erwin’s mind was so spontaneous, he didn’t know how to configure it in his mind.

 

“Hey.”

 

“Hm?”

 

“Did we just kiss?”

 

“Judging by how motivated and energized I am to continue working on this score search, I would assume so.”

 

Levi snorted, but grew uneasy immediately. He looked back to the desk, taking a moment to think. His brows furrowed, and he demanded Erwin’s attention by resting a hand firmly against his knee. The blonde looked up, raising a brow.

 

“You need to promise me something, if what just happened is going to continue.” he said firmly, but from the look in Erwin’s eyes, what they said next was already in unison.

 

“No one can know about this.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Take a shot every time my sentences are longer than 20 words. Also HI SORRY I was applying for colleges and I got in and now I am BACK and ready to talk about gay men again hi thank you for being so patient I love you


	6. Lento con Espressione

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi and Erwin are snowed in. Their relationship develops on a more personal level.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of "author-tried-to-find-fitting-music" went in to this chapter, which is why I held off a little on posting it. I jumped around with so many ideas, but Chopin seemed to be the best fit. :"") Enjoy!

_“Can you believe it? We can travel the world together. We can-.. We can go to Paris, England, France.. Austria! Oh, my love, we can go see where Mozart lived!”_

 

_“Are you sure?”_

 

_“Of course, they probably have tours there all the-”_

 

_“Erwin. No. Are you sure you want to do this?”_

 

_A younger tall blonde turned around to look to a brunette who had been sitting at a familiar kitchen table, cupping a stemless wine glass. Her honey-golden gaze was rather serious when she looked at him. The man, however, furrowed his brows up. “I-.. of course. This has been my dream since I was young.”_

 

_“Don’t you understand? We’re about to get married. I feel like we should at least have some time to settle down. We’ve been to Paris, we’ve been to England-”_

 

_“We’ve only been there on tour to play in concert halls, never to sightsee.”_

 

_“Don’t you think the concert halls count? What about the travel?”_

 

_“It’s covered by the company, dear.”_

 

 _“Erwin, are you even listening to me?” Her voice was raising the same time she stood up. She was angrier than ever, now. “I’m sick and tired of this traveling, of playing the same_ goddamn _thing over and over again for half-assed audiences! I hate leaving such a nice home every summer, I just want to get married!”_

 

_The blonde tried to keep his stance, but he was growing nervous. “You’re telling me to throw away something I love..?”_

 

_“Do you love music more than me?”_

 

_“Of course n-...”_

 

_That hesitation was all it took for the woman to take her coat and promptly leave. She would return, but not until the next morning. These fights would only escalate, further and further, until the man starts to feel the effects of the stress of a complicated-_

 

_SLAM!!_

 

Erwin gasped audibly, eyes focusing suddenly on a dim ceiling above him. After registering that he was in his room, he sighed out the rush of adrenaline. Another dream, or nightmare. He sat up, but stiffened when he felt something (or some _one_ ) stir at his side.

 

Through the cracks of creeping sunlight, Erwin’s blue eyes laid upon the sight of smooth, pale skin, black hair cut short, and the most amazing relaxed expression on a usually stiff man. Levi was here.

 

_Levi._

 

Erwin could cry out of relief. He leaned down to kiss the sleeping raven’s forehead, and sank back underneath the sheets.

 

_“Of course I do. I would never turn my back on what music does for me.”_

 

Erwin was confused with this new emotion. Now that he had more time to listen to his thoughts, he was skeptical about any romantic feeling that reintroduced itself. He’d avoided the experience for so long out of fear of heartbreak, but Levi..? Something about him felt different, and it was enough to make him reconsider at least test the waters.

 

To be quite honest, he didn’t know why he kissed Levi, or why he felt so fond of him, but for right now, it was just nice to have a companion. They didn’t need to dwell too much on the past to be comfortable in the present.

 

The next morning wasn’t silent for very long. After finding that there was waist-level snow outside, both men knew that it was going to be another day of score-searching and practicing. They sat down to a warm breakfast of oatmeal with berries, alongside accompanying teas. The coffee maker was untouched, and had been for a long time. Levi, clad in a plain black t-shirt and loose pants, sipped at a glass of water as he skimmed over his phone. On the screen was a feed of the most recent news. He looked up, however, when he heard the rattling of pill bottles.

 

Multiple pill bottles.

 

“What are those for?” blurted Levi, raising a thin brow.

 

Erwin looked down to the containers, obviously a little shy at the question. He peered down at the containers. “I take a few supplements.. These are vitamins D and B. This is an antacid, it helps keeps the acid low. This one keeps me focused, and this one reduces stress, but.. I have to take them with food, or else I’ll be ill.” In front of him sat about 6 containers. Levi’s expression immediately turned concerned, and he turned off his phone.

 

“Are they prescription, Erwin?”

 

“Half. I need to take the ones for my stomach.”

 

“That seems a little excessive, don’t you think?” Levi hesitated, biting the inside of his cheek. He shouldn’t been chipping at Erwin’s personal matters. “Sorry, I-..”

 

“It’s okay, Levi. They help me perform a whole lot better than if I were to stop them.”

 

Levi decided not to question it. Erwin took his pills, and they carried their pleasant morning on as per usual… to the sound of Mozart’s 37th symphony quietly playing in the background. It was a contestant for the season after the next, but he didn’t know how it would compare with Mendelssohn’s 3rd, the original permanent choice for the concert. They were from two different Eras, totally different styles of playing, but there was something about the difference that gave it a pleasant feel. You got a taste of how music was back then and now, especially with the addition of the harpsichord. The piece ended right as they finished their meal. Levi nodded to himself, and stood.

 

“Not _Jupiter,_ but it’s a pleasant overture. It’ll be a great transition into the third symphony.”

 

“Agreed, but there definitely should be a piece of work that brings them together, don’t you think?”

 

“Like what?”

 

“I was thinking Bach.”

 

“I’ll shoot you in the foot.”

 

Erwin huffed a laugh, leaning back in his chair. He cupped his small mug of tea, smiling wickedly at Levi. “You don’t like him?” The shorter male shook his head. “I did the double violin concerto once. When I was performing it for my mother, my bow broke. The top part of the wood snapped at the thinner curve. That composer gives me nightmares.”

 

“The concerto is rather nice, you know.”

 

“Well, yeah. I’ll give you that much.”

 

“That’s perfect.”

 

“What?”

 

“What if you played the Bach double with Marlowe?”

 

“I think we should keep looking for music.” Levi stood abruptly, Erwin’s eyes following as he washed his dishes and dried off his hands. “I’m going to practice for a while.”

 

That would be an excellent sight to see. Listening to that would be painful, utterly. The said concertmaster would probably shred through the sixteenth notes as if they were an etude, not a piece. Levi grimaced as he took out his violin. No, he wouldn’t play that with Marlowe. He had confidence that Erwin would find something great for the orchestra to play during his score search. As he warmed up, his mind slowly relaxed, and he didn’t worry too much about the conversation earlier.

 

He started his practice by working on the Mendelssohn Violin Concerto, a piece he picked up for fun when he wasn’t supposed to be in bed. The Sina Philharmonic played it two years ago with a famous traveling violinist. Levi had the record, and used that as the basis for his own practicing. Of course, he adjusted the phrasing to his own interests. He ran through concerto smoothly, doing so by memory, and by the time he was finished, he had a peeping audience member. It wasn’t until he stopped to shuffle through his music folder did he see Erwin a few feet away from the open door. He double-took at the blonde, cracking a small smirk.

 

“I can see you, you know.”

 

“I knew it too well to focus on anything else.” Erwin retaliated, stepping into the room with a kind gaze. A hand went to Levi’s back, rubbing it gently. The raven stood, and responded with a kiss to Erwin’s cheek. He set another piece of sheet music on the stand, with distracted Erwin from his delicate touches.

 

“That’s looks familiar.”

 

“Duh, it’s Chopin.”

 

“There’s a transcribed version of that nocturne?” Erwin asked, Levi nodding in return. He broke away from him to open the first page, but… as he went to start it, he stopped. If Erwin didn’t know this piece too well, there’s was no way he could have any sort of… attachment to it, right? Raising a brow, he turned, looking directly into blue eyes.

 

“Do you know it?” “Know it?” Erwin started to smile, gently so. “I know it like the back of my hand.”

 

“Well, Mister Chopin, would you like the accompaniment part?” Levi’s stomach tightened just as he asked that question, but he was met with a positive answer. Instead of being scared to touch the piano, though, Erwin was… happy to do so.

 

Wait. Was he doing this for real? Levi’s hands felt a little tingly as he gave Erwin the piano booklet, watching with slightly wider eyes as the man sat down at the grand and adjusted the seat. Erwin was smiling. Perhaps those pills really did make him feel better.

 

_20th Nocturne in C-Sharp Minor. Originally composed by Frederic Chopin, arranged by Nathan Milstein._

 

“Alright. The beginning, right?”

 

“Ah, I see. Okay. I’ll start.”

 

Levi didn’t realize what he was doing until the blonde began to play the introduction. This was someone that swore away his own passion to try and follow a life he felt forced to live, only to come out of it heartbroken. When his fingers played the beginning notes of the chord, Levi refused to turn and watch Erwin as he played. Slowly, he began to start, quiet and solemn.

 

_“I can feel your sadness, it’s obvious, but I encourage you to take a bittersweet prospective. It happened, life happens. Follow me.”_

 

As Levi rose and fell with the notes, Erwin followed, doing so at the same time. The longer they drew out the song, the closer and closer they grew together. Levi softly inhaled before a phrase, indicating how he was going to move. Rather than working as a soloist and accompaniment, however, they cooperated the spotlight.

 

He was playing with Erwin. This was real.

 

He’s never felt this close to anyone for a long time.

 

The piece ended quickly. It was only a few minutes, anyhow. Levi sighed as he lowered his violin from his shoulder. He opened his mouth to speak, but stopped when he turned around and finally looked to Erwin.

 

His eyes were rimmed red, and tears seeped from his lids to the keys and stained his pants. He was looking down, fingers slightly trembly against the ivory keys. Instantly, Levi’s heart dropped.

 

“I’m sorry. If I had known this wouldn’t be fun for you, I wouldn’t have suggested it-”

 

“Thank you, Levi.”

 

Levi’s brows furrowed in concern as Erwin began to stand, breath growing thin when he stood. The man smiled, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.

“I haven’t been able to touch this piano for six years without panicking, but just now.. It was the bliss I used to experience constantly. Just now… it was the bliss I felt so often long ago, and I know it had something to do with you.” Erwin’s voice was quiet as he took Levi’s free hand, holding it with his own. He swallowed, a lump in his throat. Levi, though red and speechless, was touched.

 

“Me? Playing that was collaborative, you know.”

 

“You led me along. I wouldn’t have known what to do without your guidance.”

 

“You’re an amazing pianist.”

 

 _“You_ are amazing, Levi.” Erwin bent down, kissing Levi’s lips and then the delicate skin under his eyes. The man huffed a laugh, pulling away when he felt the lips tickle his skin.

 

_This is nothing I would have ever expect. This is perfect._

 

“Okay.. hey, your lips are chapped. Do you want to try something else?” he asked, this time peering into brighter, more alive blue eyes. Erwin’s smile was so much lighter, it made the smaller raven’s stomach tighten.

 

“Of course. Let’s try the Mendelssohn."

 


	7. Andante con moto

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Erwin and Levi's relationship gets closer than ever before, but refuse to call it love out of their own fears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MILD SMUT WARNING - passage marked with dashes

Life had a funny way of taking one on the most unexpected, unpredictable journey. It would setting a steady path, and then immediately jump to a shortcut, or brake to take a longer way. It would bring pleasant memories, troubling times, and anything in between. Little annoyances to full breakdowns, being down to just a few coins a day to living comfortably. If a big shift happened in life, was it a sign that things were starting to change? Would it be an indicator that one is not merely a young adult trying to scrape by, but someone that is ready to take a path of passion and contentment? Could it be that instead of reaching out for a dream that was consistently thought of as false, luck and hard work would make this dream really happen?

 

Levi toyed with the thought multiple times, now that he had time to think. He continued his grocery store job throughout the off-season of the orchestra, and planned to quit within a few weeks. Being in the orchestra was enough to pay his rent, but landing concertmaster would do something even more. It would give him the stability he needed to live a little more comfortably, but some nicer clothes, and maybe even get his bow rehaired. This realization was exciting, truly, but there was something even more underlying that make him a little nervous.

 

The first time he thought about this, he imagined a life with Erwin.

 

There was something more about this man that Levi felt his heart reaching towards. They spent their days off of the orchestra season quite well; in fact, they were mostly together, brainstorming a set for the season two years from now, spending the night, and generally keeping each other company. Most of the time, they really didn’t do much romantically. It was just nice to know the other was there, thinking the same thoughts, sharing the same interests and tastes. Their minds thought alike, but had enough differences to come to fantastic conclusions. They got a lot done indoors, especially since snow was coming down pretty ruthlessly. The winter came, just now peaking for Christmas.

 

Levi’s birthday.

 

No one knew except himself and a few co-workers. As he walked into the grocery store for the day, he greeted a few fellow employees with a wave, jokingly wishing them a happy holidays as he got his uniform on and his badge on the right side of his chest. That same badge was what gave him an extraordinary opportunity to live the dream he truly wished to have.

 

Cashier duty was on his agenda today. It seemed easy enough, especially since his shift would be ending early. That meant he would be going out to dinner with Erwin tonight.

 

Is this considered a date? He didn’t know.

 

He’d like to think of it that way.

 

“Happy twenty-ninth, Levi.”

 

“Go fuck yourself.”

 

“Tsk, that isn’t any way to speak to a friend. I’m gonna go cry in the break room, now.” teased a woman with short grey-hair and silver-rimmed glasses. Rico was the store’s manager, and usually worked daily. She exchanged a smile and an envelope with his paycheck. “It’s hard to think you’re leaving our team, but I know you’re going to do amazing things.”

 

“It was an honor taking out the trash for you for so many years.”

 

“I gave you a Christmas bonus. Take your boyfriend out to dinner.”

 

“What?”

 

“Dinner. You know, that thing partners usually do to show how much they love each other.” the woman snickered, and gave the man a gentle nudge. “That blonde guy you wait around for at night is your date, right?”

 

Levi furrowed his brows. “We aren’t dating. He doesn’t-.. He can’t.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“He just doesn’t want to commit, I guess. He had a nasty divorce a long time ago and just never got over it.”

 

“That sounds like a sorry life to live.” Once Rico closed the store, she lit a cigarette. After a couple of inhales, she passed it to Levi. He did the same, exhaling the smoke into the crisp, snowy air before speaking again.

 

“Well.. he’s working on it. I think we kind of help each other, you know? I help him start to open up, and he… he brings out the best in me.”

 

“Sounds like dating to me.”

 

“W-..” Levi hesitated. She wasn’t wrong.

 

Levi’s never really had a fancy, dress-up-real-nice dinner night, but Erwin was going to change that. Once home from his shift, the pair went to a high-end restaurant in the heart of town. To celebrate the holidays, they would be served a three-course meal of some of the finest meals of the season, as well as a few glasses of fine wine. To truly enjoy this evening together, Erwin booked them a hotel close by. All was in walking distance to the concert hall. Seated in a calm corner of the dimly-lit room, Erwin was dressed even more sophisticated than usual. He wore a dark grey suit with a black shirt and tie, though kept his hair naturally side-swept for a natural look. In an effort to meet this restaurant’s standards, Levi wore his concert clothes. As of right now, it was the nicest thing we owned.

 

Once seated, he looked around, eyes wide in slight awe. “This place is amazing. Where did you find it?”

 

“I come here often for galas and events, and they would usually cater. I’ve never had their dinner course, so I thought this would be the perfect chance to try it.” Erwin responded, his deep voice hushed among the gentle chatter of the ret of the customers. He held up his wine glass, offering a quiet toast. Levi happily obliged.

 

“Merry Christmas.”

 

“Happy birthday, Levi.”

 

Levi lifted a brow as he took the first sip of his drink. It was fine, and definitely couldn’t be thrown back like a typical shot. “How’d you know? I never told you.”

 

“A friend let me know.”

 

“What friend?”

 

“The Sina Philharmonic Administration Office.” Erwin’s eyes sparked with mischief. He hid the smile with a sip of his wine. Levi smirked.

 

“You’re invasive.”

 

“I remember you telling me it was a few weeks from the last rehearsal. I just wanted to be sure.”

 

“Well, Erwin… thank you for remembering. I appreciate it.”

 

The two enjoyed a nice dinner, engaging in quiet small talk as they ate. The courses were, as Levi imagined, heavenly. There wasn’t a dish he didn’t like, and by the time the check came, he knew he had to split the bill. However, the checkbook came and went away with Erwin’s card as he was trying to find his wallet.

 

“Tsk, I’ll have to make that up to you.” Levi mumbled, folding his arms neatly across the table. Erwin raised a brow.

 

“Oh? With what?”

 

“A meal at my own expense, obviously.”

 

“You know you don’t have to.”

 

“Are you implying I do something else?” Levi had the gall to ask, leaning forwards with interest. He seemed to hit the target straight on, because as soon as he asked that question, Erwin’s mouth turned up with a sly grin.

 

“I think I have an idea.”

 

-

 

A short gasp came from Levi as he was pressed up against the heavy front door of Erwin’s home, legs clutching around the other man’s waist in a dire attempt to support his weight. The heat of kisses that went further down his neck, however, were making it hard to keep his focus. Erwin’s hands held Levi so gently, but had a rough edge that made his skin respond in shivers and goosebumps.

 

As the front of his shirt was unbuttoned, he wrapped his arms around Erwin’s shoulders, gripping the back of his brunette undercut and pulling him closer. The cool air and warm body were a tantalizing mix, and sent his senses haywire. All he wanted was him

 

Erwin acted on pure lust. His want for someone else, for a companion in this big, dark home, was starting to become too much. He needed someone at his side, someone to hold close, someone to secure him from his rapidly growing worries and thoughts. Levi was that someone.

 

“Er-!” Levi gently pressed his nails against Erwin’s back when his nipples were given attention, caught off-guard by the shivering pleasures it brought his upper body. While a tongue grazed one, fingers touched the other. Their touches were getting closer, closer. He loved it immediately, evident to his brows furrowing up, and he arched his back to give the hint.

 

“Yes…”

 

Erwin pulled away a few inches after a few minutes, standing back up straight to kiss Levi’s mouth. It contrasted their first meek kiss by going deeper than he did before, using his tongue to further explore what he couldn’t earlier. Levi immediately flushed, knees going weak at the sensation. He was so glad he was being held around Erwin’s waist, because he was sure his legs would have given out. When they broke the kiss, they were left panting to catch their breath. Levi exhaled as their foreheads pressed together.

 

“You’re driving me insane, Erwin.” Levi murmured, leaning in for another kiss. Erwin pulled back, much to his dismay, and he looked up with a confused gaze. He was met with a stern, though lustful and wanting gaze.

 

“From here on out, I want you to use ‘Maestro’ to address me.”

 

“As you wish… maestro.”

 

Erwin’s bedroom was strategically built to catch the brightest shine of the moonlight, even in the dark hours of tomorrow’s morning. Due to his and Levi’s busy lives, however, they never got to experience it this intimately. They were doing things so embarrassing but so, _so_ good that their secret would only be held in the moon. Erwin cherished Levi’s body, smoothing his hands up and down his sides, kissing his neck, his collarbone, his stomach, and his hipbone as he slowly took care of his erection with his hand.

 

Levi was in bliss. He never held in his voice as Erwin moved from one point to the next, flowing so easily, as if he knew the male body more than he did himself. One hand reached to rest behind his head as the other clung to Erwin’s hair, guiding him into a slow blowjob.

 

“Maestro.. Maestro Smith-...”

  
Holy _fuck,_ what that hot. This was literally a dream he never thought he could have. When he started saying the name Erwin told him to use more often, he could feel the start of an orgasm in his abdomen. His hips twitched. causing him to inhale sharply and gesture for the man to get off. 

 

Erwin obliged, immediately concerned. "What's wrong?" He asked, brows gently furrowed. "Aren't you going to c-" 

 

"I want to do it with you, maestro. 't the same time." Levi responded, breathless. 

 

Erwin bit his cheek to hide a smile. Nodding, he moved to part Levi's legs. "I don't think you'll need to wait very long." he murmured against Levi's neck, gently pressing his penis, already prepared and covered with a condom, against the smaller man's entrance. Their preparations eliminated any way to bringing each other discomfort. "You make me lose my mind." 

 

Levi's fingernails drug into Erwin's back as he felt the man enter, letting the initial pain simmer down into an intoxicating pleasure. His voice, though faint and slightly higher, moaned into the midnight atmosphere. His hips raised, only held down by large, slender hands. 

 

"Maestro.. Maest-..." 

 

_Erwin!..._

 

-

 

The next thing Levi remembered was waking up to a sun threatening to open his eyes. He squinted, rubbing his fingers against his lids to block out the annoyance of the sun that so rudely interrupted his morning rest. However, it wasn't the light the woke him up; to was the sound and  _smell_ of something delicious downstairs. Coffee, maybe some sausage, and.. what was that sweet smell? Could it be pancakes or pastries, or even French toast? Levi must have slept in for a while, because his stomach growled in protest for going so long without any food. He sat up, going to swing his legs towards the edge of the bed, and instantly stopped when he felt a pain shoot up his hamstrings and glutes. 

 

Last night flashed before his eyes, making him audibly inhale. 

 

Him and Erwin had sex. 

 

Good sex. Great sex, actually. Not too sober, but not hammered. 

 

Levi held back a smile as he carefully stood up, his body sore from such an eventful night. Once standing, he stretched his arms over his head, yawning, and then realized he was completely naked. Not that there was anything wrong with that, of course. He went to a small dresser to pick out an undershirt, slipping into one of Erwin's own and a pair of his own, much smaller pairs of underwear. Then, he promptly made his way downstairs. 

 

Erwin was definitely cooking them a breakfast that could probably top last night. His assumption of French toast was right, and when he was close enough, he saw that sausages, eggs, fruit, and tea were also being prepared. His heart soared, and he snuck up behind Erwin, who looked like he was watching the cooking toast quite closely. He was a little more dressed for the day, wearing a crew-neck, long sleeved black shirt and grey slacks. He hummed when he felt Levi's arms wrap around his waist, leaning against his touch. 

 

"Good morning, Levi." 

  
"Morning, Erwin." 

 

Their morning went as normal, enjoying a nice meal and a beautiful winter day. While the pair knew that last night was strictly physical, it was relieving to feel so close to someone after being alone for such a long time. Erwin looked more upbeat before taking his medication, and Levi just seemed much more relaxed than he did before. What they got out of last night was the attention they needed, without the need to use "love" as a title for their actions. 

 

Love can come later. 

 

Music filled that busy position right now. 


	8. Debile

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a turn of events. "Orchestra flu" spreads wildly after the orchestra returns, and Levi is a victim. Someone doesn't plan on making him suffer through it alone, though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fluff. Absolutely nothing but feel-good happy old men. Enjoy.

The winter was foul. Many days into the vacation were forced indoors, and news channels on television covered how bad it was in the city. Snow was knee-deep, and people were at risk for frostbite if outside for too long. Exhales were seen as clouded fog even with the smallest, thinnest breath, and three layers of clothes were no match to the dangers of the freezing winds. If the city of Sina could tackle this, they might as well be the second North Pole.

 

Luckily, the peak of the storm was over within a couple of weeks, and warm weather was starting to arrive. A day or two here and there, it permitted some to  go out in refreshing, thinner clothes, and not worry about the nipping cold threatening to compromise their immune systems. That being said, it was still a troublesome season, susceptible to an annoying concoction of seasonal allergies and sniffling colds. Just when one might think they were out of the woods, sneezes and sore throats would pull them back in.

 

This would be the unfortunate event for a lot of returning orchestra members.

 

Packets of tissues were passed around as the rehearsals started again, and as exciting as it was for Levi to be concertmaster, no one really seemed to have a concern other than to just get through the three-hour rehearsal without succumbing to exhaustion. To soften the blow, rehearsal schedules were in the morning. The wind players had it worse, probably due to the pressure it took to blow through their instrument. Asking Maestro Smith to repeat what he’d explained to the winds (because of their clogged ears) was brought up numerous times, and ended up being whispered among the violin section as a comical joke.

 

By a stroke of luck, Levi was untouched, even when Marlowe spent the dress rehearsal of the last concert sniffling and coughing in between movements. He took pride in his strong immune system, much to his friends’ dismay.

 

“How have you _not_ gotten the orchestra cold, Levi?” gawked Jean over a celebratory concert lunch. He was mostly recovered, save for a blocked-nasal voice. Levi smirked.

 

“I drink about two or three cups of tea a day. Sometimes four.”

 

“Really? You don’t drink coffee?” asked Petra, sitting across from him. She was very talkative, at least to him. They saw each other often, as Levi was the one that now stood and cued her for tuning the orchestra.

 

“I don’t see a need. It tastes disgusting.”

 

“I’m impressed, I can’t go more than a few days without it, especially if I’m sick.” Petra responded, shaking her head. Her head was propped against her hand, and she looked the man in the eyes as she spoke. Her gaze sparked with interest. “What’s your favorite flavor of tea?”

 

“Oh, I like all kinds. They each have a distinct flavor that makes them different and intriguing. I personally prefer black, and decaffeinated green in the evenings.”

 

“Do you have a brand you like?”

 

“It differs, but I like the ones where the leaves are local to the country. It tastes better.”

 

“Exquisite tastes for an exquisite man.” Petra chimed, smiling brightly.

 

Levi wasn’t catching on.

 

Their small group finished lunch and said their goodbyes, bidding each other a get-well-soon. They would have five days off until the next round of rehearsals, mainly because of the physical demands of the next concert. Shostakovich’s 7th, which was an hour and a half long, and Lizst’s 2nd Hungarian Rhapsody.

 

As Levi was walking back to his apartment, he could feel a soreness in the back of his throat.

 

“So, you’ve got five days off. What do you plan on doing, Maestro?”

 

“Oh, I’ve been listening to the Shostakovich like a madman. I think I’ll just be doing a lot of preparation.” A deep sigh was heard over the phone. “Are you sure you can’t come over tonight?”

 

Levi bit his bottom lip to keep himself from smiling too wide. “I’ve got to work my last few days at the grocery store. I can come over the day after, if you really miss me.”

 

“Not even if I offer dinner?”

 

A chuckle turned into Levi needing to clear his throat. It was increasingly sore and uncomfortable as the night went on, but the man obviously blamed it on the atmosphere. Erwin, however, immediately voiced his concern.

 

“Don’t tell me you’re getting the orchestra flu. Are you feeling alright?”

 

“I’m okay, I’m not sick. I was just out in that wind all day, my throat is just a little dry. I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay?”

 

“Alright. Have a good night, Levi.”

 

“You too, Erwin.”

 

Being in this tiny apartment after spending so much time in a grand mansion obviously took some adapting. Gourmet teas and food went back to teabags and microwaving water, and it made Levi feel so… hollow. It wasn’t the fancy upgrades that he missed, though.

 

The cold realization that there was no one to share a bed with was making him go crazy.

 

He missed Erwin’s presence. Even without the extra affection, it was just nice to have someone next to him as he ate and slept, or even nearby as he practiced. He missed their little conversations in between searching for good concert scores, or sharing a joke whenever a stressful task came around. As Levi went through those memories, he could feel his stomach churn with that gnawing ache for companionship. Erwin was so much more than just someone he seeked affection with, and it was clear he was coming to realize that. He needed that man more than he thought, and to have all of it stripped away and feel like he was back in square one didn’t sit well.

 

He suddenly rushed to the bathroom, his stomach refusing to hold back the clear evidence that he caught a flu strain.

 

\------

 

_Bzzt. Bzzt._

 

_.._

 

_Bzzt, Bzzt, Bzzt._

 

“What?”

 

“Levi?”

 

“Fuck.” Levi’s burning insides and full-body ache were apparent as soon as he woke up, immediately causing him to curl his legs into his body and groan. “I can’t come in, Rico. I’m dying.”

 

A laugh was heard on the other line. “Alright, Mister Immune, I’ll let you off for today, but you owe me a drink. Not tea, though, but it sounds like you need that.”

 

“Shut up.”

 

Levi was officially sick. The blocked nose, sore throat, swollen lymph nodes, and inability to even _move_ were all telltale signs that he just needed to let his system work through the bug until he felt better. It wasn’t until about a few hours after he woke up he tried to make himself tea, the weakness of his muscles causing him to sit down as he waited for his drink to brew. As he waited, he figured he might as well try to make something to e-

 

...Moldy bread and a foul stench all kindly let him know that he forgot to go grocery shopping in the past week, mainly due to his excessive visits to Erwin’s home. He closed the door after swallowing down the urge to throw up.

 

He couldn’t bother Erwin. Not like this, at least. He couldn’t even go close to him with this mess of an illness. As he steeped his tea and shuffled back into bed, he tried to will away his symptoms by listening to a few records.

 

Beethoven’s Third, Mozart’s Violin Concertos One, Two, and Three. Hell, even that Arutunian Trumpet Concerto Jean did two years ago made this sickness a little easier for Levi to handle. Even if he was living off tea and Dayquil for a few hours, the music was able to take his mind off of it. He was about ten minutes into a flute concerto by the principal flautist Historia Reiss, when his peaceful, sickness-induced thoughts were interrupted by his phone buzzing.

 

Erwin Smith. _Fuck._ Levi grit his teeth when he saw the name appear on his phone screen. With reluctance, he answered the call.

 

“Hello?” His voice cracked in protest.

 

“Levi? Are you okay?” Erwin’s voice was immediately concerned, almost pressing.

 

“God, _no._ I can’t come over tomorrow, I’m sorry.”

 

“Have you had anything to eat? Drink?”

 

“All my food’s gone bad, but I took some medicine and tea. I’ll be fine in a few days.”

 

“I’m coming over.”

 

“Are you fucking joking?” A shiver ran through Levi’s body, causing him to bunch his bedsheets closer to his form. “Erwin, this cold is awful, I don’t know how people got through it. I don’t want you getting it.”

 

“I’m not letting the concertmaster of my orchestra starve through the _flu._ I’ll be there in ten minutes.” Erwin’s voice seemed pretty hellbent, and Levi didn’t have the energy to fight him on it. He hung up with a low groan.

 

“Please, don’t let me pass this to him.”

 

\---

As promised, the doorbell rang as soon as Levi felt like he was easing back into a nap, waking him up a little rudely. After taking a few minutes to stand up and stumble to the door, he only got to unlocking it when he felt Erwin open it.

 

“Christ, Levi, you look pale. Do you have a fever?” Erwin’s brows furrowed up with concern. His hair was in its natural state, falling delicately against his forehead. He was very put together, and his right hand was holding a grocery bag. He stepped inside, closing the door behind him. “Gosh, it’s cold out there. Do you have a heater?”

 

“Good morn-..” He looked over at the clock, and when he looked back, he was met with a warm palm gently pressed against his forehead. “..afternoon to you, too.”

 

Erwin grit his teeth. “You definitely have a fever. Go and get back in bed. Have you eaten anything today?”

 

Levi was more than happy to comply. “No. Like I said, everything’s spoiled.” He shuffled back to his bedroom as he spoke.

 

“Good. I came prepared, then.”

 

“..What?”

 

“Why aren’t you in bed?”

 

Several minutes passed, and as curious as Levi wanted to be, his body forced him to remain in the confined walls of his small bedroom. It was pretty tiny, considering it was packed with a desk, bed, dresser, and record player. It was smaller than the average school dormitory. After spending a long time breathing through his mouth and facing the wall, he heard footsteps drawing closer, rolling over when he smelled a pleasant, savory aroma that immediately made his mouth water.

 

“What is that?” Levi asked, immediately sitting up. His body refused, making him shudder, and he drew a knee in to support his body.

 

“Chicken soup. I made some last night.” Erwin responded, sitting on the edge of the bed as he gave him the bowl. It was steaming, but lukewarm enough to be sipped comfortably. Levi did so, and then ate upon realizing how harshly his stomach had been protesting food all day. He hadn’t eaten since throwing up, and this was bland enough for his stomach to handle. Erwin exhaled in relief when he saw Levi’s appetite come back.

 

“Have you had any water?”

 

“Uh.. yeah. Wait.. no. I had tea.”

 

“You’ve got to stay hydrated, to get this bug out.” Erwin clicked his tongue, causing Levi to hide a smile. This guy was acting like a worried mother, but… he wasn’t complaining. Even though his throat was killing him and his body felt like he was on the verge of being sick, Erwin was here with him. Just remembering that was bringing his symptoms down a little bit, and it made him feel a little calmer. After finishing a good majority of the bowl, he handed it back to the blonde, who gently placed it on the desk nearby.

 

Levi tilted his head back and closed his eyes. Erwin soothingly rubbed his knee.

 

“I feel awful.”

 

“I know, I had it the week after the concertmaster auditions.”

 

“You’re joking. I thought you said that was allergies?”

 

“Everyone says it’s allergies before it gets bad.” Erwin chuckled, shaking his head. “Even I was naive to think otherwise. That day I texted you about how I was busy? I was sick in bed, just like you.”

 

“Okay, no need to rub it in.”

 

God, they just had such a nice rhythm in conversation. Nothing was forced, nothing was mistaken. They understood each other so much more than anyone else. With a warm smile, Erwin leaned in to kiss Levi’s forehead. “Rest. You need it.”

 

Levi slid beneath the covers, pulling the blanket up to his chin. His body shivered like he was cold, though sweat was soon starting to form beneath his clothes. He felt disgusting, but knew that he just needed to let this pass. At least he wasn’t throwing up anymore.

 

Was this a dream? All he wanted was Erwin, and it seemed like the universe answered his demand. He never would have thought that the man he’d been pining for years would have been so ready to rush over to his house with a bag full of food. Hell, even this Sina Phil stuff was still making him a little disoriented. It all just felt like one big heaven, almost too good to be true.

\---

When he woke up again, it was dark outside, and he sat up with a jolt. His stomach protested, though calmed when he realized he didn’t feel as shaky as he did before, though still not terribly good. Without a level head, he knew he wasn’t going to think straight, but right now, his mind was playing tricks on him. His vision was spotty, and his lips lost their color. What if all of this really _had_ been a dream? What if he just dreamt this entire experience and suddenly woke up after breaking his fever?

 

_No._

With a thin, shaky breath, Levi jumped out of the bed and stumbled to his bedroom door. It was closed, but he could see the lights from the living room were on. His knees were wobbly and weak, but he persisted, opening the door and holding on to the side wall as he willed himself further, step by step.

 

_Erwin.. Erwin, please… This can’t be a dream. I need you._

 

“Levi? Are you awake?”

 

“Levi!”

 

The short male’s emotional response sent him on the brink of passing out. He fell to his knees, nausea chilling his face, but before his cheek hit the carpet, strong arms helped him over to the couch, where he lay with his head on the armrest. He was tired, hungry, but _God,_ was he relieved. His breath was labored as he looked up to the ceiling, trying to gain composure.

 

Erwin immediately came over with a glass of water, assisting the sickened male with sitting up. He drank a good majority of it, panting when he came up for air.

 

“Sorry, I-”

 

“There’s no need. You needed the rest.” Erwin retaliated, setting the glass down and finally looking Levi in the eyes. His blue eyes were so, so vibrant, but his brows furrowed.

 

“Are you alright? Your eyes are rimmed red.” Again, he placed a hand to his head. “Your fever broke, you feel a lot cooler.”

 

“I’m sorry. I-.. I thought you weren’t here. I just had.. I had a bad fever dream.” Levi stammered to try and get his point across without sounding too much like an idiot. Erwin didn’t seem to think such, because he then felt hands rub his achy shoulders.

 

“It’s okay, Levi. I’m here. I’ve been here.” Erwin responded, allowing the peaceful silence to follow linger on a little bit. He didn't care if Levi just admitted to crying because he felt lonely. It felt nice just to have each other’s company.

 

“I threw out the older food. I was going to do more, but you already keep the place so clean…”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“You…” Erwin stopped, almost as if he was hesitating. Levi arched a brow, prompting him to say what was on his mind.

 

“You really have all of the Sina Phil records. All the ones of when I was conducting, at least.”

 

Levi blushed immediately, eyes widening. “You saw? Were you snooping through my stuff?”

 

“No! Absolutely not, I would never. I was just going to set up a bath once you were awake, and I... saw them in your closet.”

 

Levi pursed his lips. Well.. he couldn’t argue with that. He looked off to the side, a little flustered.

 

“Hey.. I’m honored you have them, you know.”

 

“Yeah, but that makes it seem like I’m a stalker.” _You poured your heart out_ _into each recording._

 

“Does that mean all of the Phil donors are stalkers, too? You supported us, even when you probably couldn’t afford it.”

 

“I love them.” _I love you._

 

“This only reassures me that you are the perfect fit for my orchestra.”

 

_You’re the perfect fit for me._

 

After a dinner of bread and more soup, mainly to calm Levi’s stomach down, Erwin helped him in and out of the bath, into some clean clothes, and finally, helped him back into bed. It was almost eleven o’clock now. Even with a day of sleep, Levi still felt extremely tired, due to the sickness stripping him of his energy. He laid down with a sigh, realizing he felt a lot better than he did before. Erwin ran a hand through his hair.

 

“Your face has some color back. I'm guessing you feel better.”

 

“I do. Erwin, thank you for being there for me.”

 

“Of course. The minute I heard your voice last night, I had a feeling this was going to happen.” Erwin leaned down, kissing the side of his head. He rested his nose there, the warmth of Levi’s hair feeling so, so good on his nose. He was so happy to be at the raven’s side, even if he was ill. “I missed you. It’s so empty in that house without hearing your violin in the morning.”

 

“I missed you, too.” Levi’s chest tightened. He didn’t want Erwin to leave. Not now, at least.

 

Even if he was only a few inches away, he could feel all that panic rush back into his form when the blonde stood up to walk out of the bedroom. He inhaled.

 

“Wait!”

 

Erwin stopped, hand hovering over the doorknob. He looked back, hands falling to his sides, ready to take on any task the man asked. “Yes, Levi?”

 

“Please, stay here. At least until I fall asleep.” His voice was thin, almost fearful. “Promise me you’ll only leave when you know I’m out until the morning.”

 

Erwin exhaled, a smile on his face. “Of course.” What he failed to mention to Levi, however, was that he intended on staying here for the next day. And if Levi wasn’t cured by then, the day and night after that.

 

Truthfully, Erwin was risking his immune health taking care of Levi. He never contracted the “orchestra flu” that was making its rounds, nor did he wallow in bed with sniffles. His mind was blinded by taking care of Levi, and making sure he would make a speedy recovery, because in his mind, the man’s wellbeing was a priority. Like Levi’s own emptiness, the distance from them drove him insane, enough to make him prepare that chicken noodle soup even into the long hours of the night yesterday, to arriving at Levi’s apartment with a bag ready with essentials this morning.

 

Levi completed him, he completed Levi, and both of them were too cautious to admit it to one another.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys I'm grinning so much. I took a month off, let my writing have a break, and came back with so much motivation to continue this story again. Enjoy this little idea I thought of before we return to our regularly scheduled plotline. Comments appreciated!! :)


	9. Poco Rallentando

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The stress of the other musician's drama is starting to take a toll on Levi's performance. Erwin has a great solution.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains smut.

“The past two concerts have been an amazing way to start the new season. I understand that we’ve gone through some bad storms, but now’s our chance to cast aside the equally as dark music and focus on some lighter ones. Seeing you smile even after two and a half hours of playing is definitely more refreshing.”

 

“Yeah, ‘cuz it’s not Shotakovich.”

 

“Or Mahler.”

 

Groans of relief and light laughter flow through the crowd. Even Levi snickers, giving Marlowe a mutual gaze that reads, “You and I both know this is going to be a well-deserved turn of events.”

 

The deep, dulcet voice of the maestro bid the musicians a happy farewell on a Sunday evening. The sun was just beginning to descend behind the distant hills, signalling the conclusion of today’s rehearsal. The Sina Philharmonic was concluding their first sightreading rehearsal with a new motivation to jump the gun in this next concert. After all, February brought not only cusping spring weather, but a happier attitude for the younger groups. The repertoire itself was on the romantic side; _Scheherazade_ was the highlight of the concert, with Borodin’s Prince Igor to accompany the devil of a piece Rimsky-Korsakov composed.

 

Levi loved it. He’s only heard these pieces performed on a record player, never live, and _never_ got the chance to play the solo violin part before. It was so surreal, and it definitely made his heart soar. As he read through the music, his breath grew thin and shaky, his stomach tightened, and his arms had goosebumps. He poured his excitement into every note, and from what he could tell by facial expressions of those around him, he was translating it well for a supposed “sight-reading.”

 

That wasn’t the best part, though.

 

The connection he had with Erwin was vastly different than any violinist or musician alike in this orchestra had. He understood Erwin, and as more days passed, they connected with one another, and allowed themselves to open up. Still, though, that object of “loving” one another remained shut and locked up deep within their hearts, refusing to let even the closest of souls break it open. The ease that would fill their empty hearts, however, was their music. Erwin, through his piano or conducting, and Levi, through his violin.

 

Erwin was an amazing conductor. He heard everything before it happened, and even before he looked at the music. Levi knows how carefully he takes his score notes. Weeks before the next set, he huddles himself in his large home, listening to different recordings, taking extensive notes, and even after sitting for hours on end, is willing to offer Levi a smile and an invitation for dinner. It’s not because he was trying to prioritize the other’s wellbeing; he _loves_ it. Music is his life, and it wasn’t too long ago that he was suddenly unable to speak the language that came so easily to him. Now, with the introduction of someone that was slowly coaxing him out of his emotional hiatus, he began to return to his passionate demeanor, and remind himself why he became so enamoured with classical music in the first place.

 

It seemed like the light at the end of the tunnel was finally starting to become even more reachable than before.

 

“Levi, I-.. I still don’t know how to thank you. My fingers feel so much lighter and in control on the fingerboard with that different way of thinking about grip.” Eren was red in the face as thanked Levi, bowing slightly in respect.

 

“Of course, Eren. Your pinkie was uncomfortably straight, and I don’t want you to hurt yourself.” he responded, tone smooth and light. Eren was insanely talented, and deserved to be treated with the same amount of respect he got most of the time. He’d be associate concertmaster in no time, if Marlowe was slipping as far as he was.

 

Even with Erwin’s advice, the concertmaster laureate was checking out more and more as the rehearsals went on. It was disappointing, but he had different personal situations that weren’t going to be fixed unless he made a change. Levi predicted that he was going to quit within the next few years.

 

That wasn’t even half of the interpersonal situations Levi was starting to notice more and more throughout the orchestra. Upon numerous post-rehearsal lunches, he was learning about who was dating who, what musician had competitive beef with whom, and their rapid-fire opinions on the music at hand. For example, a recent lunch consisted of Jean complaining about how often he’d played the Rimsky-Korsakov, while bassist Bertoldt Hoover retaliated by explaining how much of a bother it was to first have such dry, uneventful passages, and then had to sit through so many soloists. Levi shot him a look, then causing him to shift uncomfortably and apologize quietly.

 

“I don’t see why you are all criticizing this piece. Sure, some of you had been playing it for years, but don’t you still get excited to perform?”

 

“Well.. yeah, but it’s Maestro Smith.” Ymir snickered, coy brown eyes locking with Levi’s own. “He’s so demanding of our own musicality, it feels controlling. We can’t all be his perfect musician, in case you didn’t know. Some of us don’t like to be criticized for our way of interpretation.”

 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Levi responded, tone turning hostile and dark. His brows furrowed, and the group grew a little less cheerful.

 

“He really hasn’t done it to you?” Petra asked, arching a brow. “We’re not in the Sina Phil just to be here. We all have our own way of expressing music, but Maestro limits it greatly.”  

 

“So, when we play something in a way we think is right, but have it talked down by the conductor, it’s a little discouraging.” Marco added in.

 

“A _lot_ discouraging.” Jean grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest. “It was worse when you weren’t here, Levi, but it’s still annoying.” 

Levi was in slight disbelief. He thought the glum faces throughout the orchestra were because of the length of rehearsals and childish nature of some of the musicians, not because they actually _despised_ what Erwin was doing. He looked down to his cup of tea, lips pursed.

 

“I don’t understand. The music has been sounding amazing lately.”

 

“That’s ‘cuz he hasn’t done it as much now. He’s a lot happier with you around.” Armin noted, looking over to Eren for confirmation. Before he could answer, however, Ymir shot back one very common observation.

 

“Well, that’s what happens when you find new love.”

 

Levi’s breath hitched in his throat. “What are you on about?” he pressed. Ymir smirked, leaning back and shrugging slightly.

 

“Well, it’s obvious. When you both arrive and leave for rehearsals at the same time, or when Maestro prefers to ask you for advice on the songs… or, you know… when he just plucks someone right off the street and drops them into the concertmaster’s position.”

 

The group fell silent, their neutral faces all in silent agreement. Levi was speechless, eyes slightly wider than usual and his hands hovering over the warmth of his cup. Is this really what the others thought of his relationship with Erwin? His chest was pounding, but not because of it being true.

 

He didn’t know if Erwin loved him, and he didn’t want this exposed.

 

“That’s bullshit.” Levi hissed, his tone evident that he didn’t want to talk about it anymore. “I’m not in a relationship with him.”

 

“Levi, hold on.” Armin spoke up, holding out a hand. “It’s okay if you are, we’re not mad at y-”

 

“I said I’m not.” Levi pressed, raising his voice slightly. “If it really looks like that, we only respect each other’s opinion. Our way of interpreting music is mutual, nothing more.”

 

A very quiet exhale of relief came from the strawberry-blonde woman across from him.

 

“Heard it here, folks. The perfect love story doesn’t exist.” Ymir joked, almost as a way to break the uncomfortable silence.

 

“A-fucking-men.” Reiner held up his glass in a silent toast.

 

The conversation that took place left an unpleasant taste in Levi’s mouth. He thought he was respected a little more in this orchestra, but that obviously wasn’t the case. From what it sounded like, the small group really thought that he and Erwin were dating. In a sense, though… weren’t they? Why didn’t Levi want to accept the fact that those kisses and embraces throughout the night were more than just comfort for their lost hearts? Was it his own emotional restriction, or Erwin’s assumed unavailability? This uncertainty was making his head spin as he exited the restaurant, and he took a deep breath in the fresh, cool air.

 

“Levi!”

 

When he looked back, he saw Petra jogging towards him, holding a cellphone in her hand. She smiled as soon as she reached him. “You forgot your phone.”

 

“Oh. Thank you.” Levi slipped the phone into his pocket. “I wasn’t thinking straight in there, I’m sorry.” 

“No need. I’m sorry those guys were so pressing on you.” She was apologizing as if she had been agreeing with Levi the entire time. “It was very rude of them to jump to conclusions, and I want you to know that whatever they say about it shouldn’t affect your enjoyment of the orchestra.”

 

“I really appreciate that, Petra. Thank you.” Still, Levi was oblivious. He checked the time on his watch. “I’ve got to head to work, but thank you again. I’ll see you in rehearsal.”

 

He left the woman standing there, a hand clutching the shoulder strap of her purse with a gentle smile. She knew the man needed his space, but one can dream.

 

After all, her phone number was now inputted right below Erwin’s.

 

\---

 

Levi was going to hold his tongue on what the other musicians said for now. He didn’t want to think about it, especially when he was practicing. It was evening, and the Maestro Smith’s home wasn’t winding down for the night just yet. As Erwin worked with his scores in the living room, Levi was in the quaint space with the large piano, slowly going over each of the solo parts in _Scheherezade._ If something didn’t sound polished or clean, he took it half the speed, making sure each note was crystal clear. The double stops within one of the first few cadenzas were probably the hardest, and after the fifth failed attempt of getting them absolutely _perfect,_ he was starting to get frustrated.

 

“Fuck..” Levi said midway through the passage, gritting his teeth and playing it one more time. The last attempt sounded better, but it was a little slower. He tried the next one at full speed, butchering the last note’s intonation. Again, frustration took the form of an exasperated huff.

 

“To be fair, it already sounds a lot more polished, from a listener’s standpoint.” Erwin’s voice spoke behind Levi, and he stepped away from his spot at the door frame to look a little closer at the music. These pleasant interruptions were common, and Levi didn’t mind his critiques. He exhaled, letting his violin rest on his shoulder.

 

“Are you sure I should do this? Maybe I’ll just call in sick for the concert.” Levi joked sarcastically, immediately regretting it as the past conversation crossed his mind.

 

_“God, I hate Scheherazade. The clarinet part sucks. I wish we weren’t playing it.”_

 

Levi shook his head. “I’m kidding.” he enforced, looking over at Erwin. “I’m not being serious.”

 

Erwin arched a brow. That was quite uncharacteristic of Levi’s usual personality. “I didn’t think you were.” he reassured, gaze growing a little concerned when he saw the man’s glance shift uneasily. He rested a hand on his shoulder, rubbing it gently.

 

“Perhaps you should take a break.”

 

“Are you sure it sounds better than it did in rehearsal? I want to do this piece justice.”

 

“It sounds stunning. Don’t be so hard on yourself” Erwin’s voice dropped in volume, and he leaned down to kiss the top of Levi’s head. His hands rested against the narrowest dip of his waist, fingers dancing against his sides soothingly. Levi’s body tingled. As often as they embraced this intimately, it was never while he was practicing.

 

It was kind of alluring.

 

The hot breath of his neck made his stomach tighten, and he tilted his head to the side to give the taller man a little more room for exploration. Lips were gentle against the working tendon, though turned more hasty as they neared his neck. Levi’s mouth gaped open in how _good_ that felt, but why would he start doing this now?

 

“What are you..”

 

“Play the passage again.” the man responded, erotic undertones in his whispering. “The beginning phrase.”

 

Soon, those worried thoughts were the least of his concerns. He was more focused on the hand that ran down his stomach, another working to unbutton his shirt. It wasn’t until he regained composure did he try to play again.

 

Instead of the frustration, this solo had a sweetness that was lighter. His fingers felt as if they were feathering the fingerboard, almost mimicking the hands against his body. Certain touches gave his musicality greater emotion than it had been before when he was riddled with the stress of trying to get each note perfect. Lips that gently bruised his collarbone accentuated the accelerando, and the dips in dynamics were more pronounced when those hands moved closer to his groin. When he finished the solo of the first movement, he was breathless, the blush on his face making his cheeks feel too hot for his clothes. Erwin, however, didn’t plan on stopping.

 

“The next movement.”

 

Levi played, and Erwin touched his body. His hands never faltered or shook as they laid against the fingerboard, though his body did shiver and his knees threatened to collapse beneath him. He didn’t have time to focus on the intonation; he was too busy trying not to make himself look like an idiot, even if he trusted Erwin.

 

“I don’t know how long I can go.” Levi sighed at the end of the next movement, looking down at the man kneeling before him with eyes glazed in lust. His pants weren’t off just yet, but the blonde was certainly making him wish they were with kisses to the inside of his thigh.

 

“You seem to be enjoying yourself.” Erwin hummed, eyes twinkling in his own aroused amusement before looking back down to the leg he was touching. “Let’s keep talking to a minimum. Play them all through.”

 

The height of the third movement’s solo made him stumble. As he slid up to the highest note on the E string, his vibrato was even greater than before as he stumbled to keep himself upright. Hands shrugged down the front of his pants and underwear, and still, Erwin held him back. His erection was increasingly obvious, but he knew he was going to be held back.

 

With great reluctance, he took his time throughout the movements, letting himself enjoy this moment between the two of them. It was greater than the other times they spent together, mainly because Levi didn’t have time to focus on what he’d been worrying on. All that mattered in this moment was Erwin and his music. By the end of the fourth movement, Erwin had taken his penis out, and his shirt was unbuttoned, revealing the rise and fall of his chest from his labored breathing, which increased as he tried to hold out the last note. He was patient, and it led him straight to the best feeling in the world.

 

Erwin was about to open his mouth when he heard Levi exhale, finishing the solos he played. His face was flushed, and he resorted to setting his violin down gently on the carpeted ground. As soon as his hands were free, he grabbed fistfuls of Erwin’s air, coaxing him immediately into sucking his dick.

 

It didn’t take him long to reach a climax with the way Erwin was treating him, though. Not only was his mouth too much to handle, hands ran against his body, even up to his chest and around his nipples. Levi was in bliss, and he needed to support his body by pressing a hand back against the wood of the closed piano. The wheels were locked. It wasn’t going anywhere.

 

“E-Erwin!”

 

Levi’s voice was strained, but there was no stress on his mind when he felt the orgasm take over his form. His back stiffened, and his brows furrowed up as his jaw gaped slightly. _This_ was the tranquility and bliss he needed. His mind was empty as he shivered through coming into the warmth of Erwin’s mouth. The sight he saw when he looked down was almost enough to get him hard all over again.

 

Erwin’s throat worked to swallow while also trying to breathe in and out of his nose, and as soon as he knew Levi was finished, he took the flaccid penis out of his mouth, kissing the base of it to help Levi come down from his high. Hands not only touched the areas that made the man sensitive, but also supported him to keep him from falling. His knees ached from being on the ground for so long, but his priority was pleasing Levi, even if his own crotch was unbearably hard against the restriction of his pants.

 

“Are you okay?” he murmured, voice glossy and cheeks pink. He looked up to Levi, who was grabbing at the shoulder hems of his shirt, coaxing him to stand.

 

“Kiss me.”

 

\---

 

A lightning fast trek to the bedroom resulted in Levi jumping onto Erwin’s bed, beckoning him over with a hand. Erwin followed suit, stripping off his shirt, then his pants, and finally, throwing his underwear aside. They could clean it up later. Levi reached over into the nightstand nearby and took out a bottle of lubricant, coating his fingers with it swiftly.

 

“Have you had experience with this?” Erwin asked, innocence threaded in his voice. Levi looked up, massaging the oil against his skin. He nodded.

 

“I do. Is this your first time with a man?”

 

“Yes.” Erwin’s voice was quieter, almost bashful. Levi nodded, and he leaned over to give the blonde a few affectionate pecks on the cheek.

 

“Let me guide you through it.”

  


Erwin watched as Levi prepared himself, drinking in the sight of his nude form so close to his own. If he wanted to please the man he desired, he wanted to make sure he knew what made him feel the best, and he was ready to take on that challenge. He was sitting up against the headboard, and Levi was in the best position to ride him. His fingers pumped in and out of him, scissoring to relax his muscles and to accommodate the bigger cock soon to be stretching him inside. The thought of that alone was sending electricity through his body, and he bit his tongue to hold back the vocal response his body nearly forced out of him.

 

_Months ago, I didn’t think I would ever talk to Erwin. Now, I’m about to have sex with him._

 

_I feel drunk._

 

Both men allowed themselves to relax as soon as Levi sunk down onto Erwin’s penis, a quiet moan humming from the smaller raven’s throat. Yes, this felt alright. The light sting at the beginning quickly warmed into familiar, euphoric pleasure.

 

Hands on his hips broke his concentration. A faint gasp came from Levi when he felt fingers grip his right pelvis to try and  carefully rotate him. Levi complied, facing the blonde with a flushed, slightly sweaty face. Erwin kissed him, long and rougher than before. From how often they made out. his tongue was very familiarized with Levi’s mouth now, and he wanted to remember it vividly.

 

“You feel amazing.” he exhaled, hands snaking down to grip Levi’s ass. He squeezed it as soon as he started to move his hips.

 

At that point, holding back moans were impossible. Levi was in pure ecstasy, the roughness of Erwin’s dick inside of him sending him into cloud nine. His arms wrapped around the man’s neck, controlling him as he met the counter motion of his hips.

 

_I can’t leave him after this. I need him in my life. I’m going to go insane off of his love._

 

From the glazed expression and tight grip on Levi’s sides, it seemed that Erwin was enjoying this immensely. To put it bluntly, it just felt right. The tightness of his ass differed greatly from the way a woman felt, and while it was a new experience, he welcomed it with open arms. He enjoyed it, and even wanted it _rougher._ He moved his hands up onto Levi’s waist, but before he could say a breathless word, his mind was read.

 

“Harder. You can go harder.” Levi leaned back on Erwin’s legs, propping his torso up with his hands as his hips tried desperately to satisfy that deep want in his g-spot. Their position changed when he knew he wasn’t getting enough, the larger man’s taller frame looming over his smaller one. His hips arched up so Erwin could get a better angle, and his feet hovered in the air. He didn’t feel entrapped. In fact, he felt relieved. Having someone this close to him made him feel amazing, especially when their gazes met in the heat of each other’s arousal.

 

_I love you. I love you._

 

“More...”

 

_I can’t get enough of you._

 

“Erwin… Fuck…”

 

_I don’t want to leave your side._

 

“Harder…”

 

_But I have no idea if you love me back, or if you’re willing to let someone else into your life so soon after your heart broke._

 

Levi’s head tilted back against the sheets as he came, his voice blending with Erwin’s as his body stiffened once more. His toes curled as his legs hugged the man’s waist, and his short nails clung firmly onto his back. Erwin’s eyes squinted shut, and his gaped mouth was buried against Levi’s collarbone. His hips twitched though his own orgasm, and they only relaxed after they let it linger for as long as they could.

 

Levi was exhausted. His mind was on so much, and to have it all released in that one moment captured him in the tranquility he craved. When he saw Erwin’s lids hood over his eyes as he sat back up, he could tell he felt the same way. The day took a lot out of him, and they needed their rest.

 

They shared a shower, welcomed a few more kisses, and then climbed beneath the sheets, embracing one another immediately. Levi held onto Erwin’s waist, and Erwin squeezed him close, resting his nose into the man’s hair. By now, evening was long gone, and the darkness of the midnight new moon peacefully lulled them into a better state of mind.

 

“Thank you, Erwin.” Levi mumbled, his forehead pressed against the blonde’s sternum. “I needed something to break me out of that frustration.”

 

“Music is such a powerful passion, Levi, that it’s best to take a break from it sometimes.” Erwin responded. Levi could feel the vibrations of his low voice in his ear. “However, we do have rehearsal tomorrow. I want you to take it easy, Levi.”

 

“I’m going to. I know the effects that the stress of perfection can have on some.”

 

Whatever Levi felt during that moment was something he’d never experienced with other partners. Usually, all he wanted was something that satisfied the wanting pleasures of his body, but tonight, all he wanted was Erwin. His heart, his approval, his smile, his eye contact, his dick, he got all of it and more in that moment, and it made his heart soar, but also ache desperately. Would he need to come clean about his feelings now, or just let it slide until Erwin confessed first? Was Erwin ready to handle another relationship?

 

 _Relationship._ What a strong word. Levi didn’t have the energy to focus on such a doting topic right now. He could worry about it tomorrow.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After years of rp, I'm happy to have finally written an entire intercourse scene on my own! Comments and critiques always appreciated though :)

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Constructive comments and kudos are appreciated. I'm kinda going into this without a plan for chapters, so I'll... play it by ear to see how this story goes, pun intended.


End file.
